How do you respond when fishy players try to tell you how to play the game?

We've all been there. A really fishy, totally unbalanced player sits down. You profile them perfectly in like 5 minutes, usually they either have way too many bluffs, or (more typically) none at all. They win some big pots against various people at the table, you run cold for like 3 hours, and right after you suffer a big loss they suddenly start telling you how to play the game, mistakenly thinking that all that time they've spent playing Pokemon has somehow made them a Pokermaster.

Typical comments:

• "The money should never have gone in the middle." The situation was a coin flip and they just don't know the odds.
  
• "If you're not getting good cards you just have to make more bluffs." Wrong, you should make bluffs when the situation calls for it, and not just because you're getting bad cards.
  
• "You're raising too many hands, try to make a hand before putting money in the middle." Except that if I do this, the same exploits I use against 90% of my opponents will be usable against me.
  
• "It's better to bet small so they can call you." Typically this player has made full house like seven or eight times this session and has barely managed to double their buy-in.
  

etc.

Like, do you just nod sagely at their "timeless wisdom"? Do you somehow pretend not to be irritated? Personally I mostly just sit there gritting my teeth, but it's honestly quite tilting hearing this crap and not saying anything about it.