How to Deal with Bullying

I'd reiterate what others said. I'm not on the spectrum but several people have suspected so as I'm naturally very introverted and pretty weird.

Eventually I developed really good social skills, at least in certain contexts. It can be done. One breakthrough moment for me was realizing you can just ask people questions and they are happy to talk about themselves. Jobs are a great subject. All kinds of people play poker: cops, fisherman, rich guys, athletes, salesmen, entrepreneurs... learn to take a genuine interest.

Spergy people can be off putting when they are totally self centered. Develop compassion and an interest in others, which also helps at poker.

One good piece of advice I heard on bullying/criticism is to stop being a b.

If you're very sensitive to criticism it's probably because you have a fear that is true, or you have low self esteem in general and think others are exposing the truth you don't want to face.

Like, if someone said you were a spy for Joseph Stalin or a lizard person you probably wouldn't be offended and just think they were crazy. So why do more plausible insults bother you?

Just embrace the fact that you're flawed. It's fine. If you're short, you're short. If you're fat, you're fat.

Either the flaw you have is real, and that's just a fact. Maybe it's something you can work on. Maybe it's just a fact of reality. Oh well. Why worry about some basic fact like being old, fat, big nosed, etc. Would it be less true if nobody said it?

Or the insult is false, so who really cares. It's like someone saying you are a Soviet spy.

If someone tries to use words to create a negative reaction in you you can defeat them by not having that reaction.

If someone says you're going to blow the dealer later say "only if he makes at least $10 in tips."

Sure, but those guys went there specifically for that experience. I thought about trying that game out myself.

A casino is almost the last place on earth a person should need to be concerned with literal "bullies." There are cameras everywhere, and armed security available quickly if anything goes wrong. Even if the person is scrawny and nervous as OP describes himself. In the worst case scenario, if he wins a bunch and is still afraid then he can get security to escort him to his car.

But what OP describes as "bullying" is not physical attacks or threats. It's mostly verbal. The fact, which everyone here seems to be evading, is that the world is full of awful trashy people with few or no redeeming qualities. Some of these people have money and an urge to gamble. They tend to concentrate in places where they can satisfy that urge. They are not worthy of your respect. The only attention you need give them is that required to find out how best to take their money. Be courteous to civil people, of course, but that shouldn't need to be said.

A hog farmer profits from handling swine, but he has to learn to ignore the stench. Anyone working in a casino, which includes winning poker players, profits from handling two-legged swine. These usually don't stink, but do make a lot of hideous noises. If you learn to think of their speech as nothing but that, the grunts and squeals of animals, you'll find it much easier to ignore. It's simply a necessary condition of working with filthy beasts. Visualize them as delicious sizzling bacon. If one is trying hard to provoke a reaction from you, it might also be useful to visualize each step of the process you'd use to turn him into bacon.

If this is beyond your ability, you'll just have to find some other way of making money.

I do agree that a casino is among the last places I would bully, assualt, batter, whatever someone...patron or employee.

I was once the victim of a minor assault (probably technically battery since there was physical contact) while playing poker on an electronic table on a cruise ship. The V was 'bullying' most of the table (basically a bellicose rant against everyone.) Meanwhile I was getting run over by the deck in hands against him (it wasn't that hard really as he played very bad). Initially, I was willing to engage and banter with him basically poking the bear. As he escalated and got increasingly angry, I just s/d all engaging but continued to dominate him in the game. I actually believe at that point, my lack of responding to him continued to irritate him. But at that point, really nothing short of my leaving the game would have prevented anything and I was not going to "let him win" by leaving.

Eventually he reached over while shouting at me and knocked/raked my glasses off. (Why that I don't have a clue.) At that point, I simply stood and demanded security come. He quickly left even before security could arrive. But since you were literally required to use your ship pass card to play any game, leaving literally had no effect as to identifying him.

Found out later that security had s/d both of our ability to get an alcoholic drink (as well as s/d his casino access since he had left.) The next morning I had meeting with the security officer which lasted about 5 min. He said the cameras showed V was completely at fault. My alcohol access was restored but for him a) his alcohol access was suspended for the balance of the cruise (really sucked because he had purchased the unlimited alcohol package and there was no refund), b) was banned from the casino, c) could not be with in 100 ft of me and d) was permanently banned from any future cruises. They also provided me his name and address along with contact information to the proper FBI office (since it happened in international waters but voyage commenced from a US port) if I wanted to press charges. (Never did but I did consider filing civil action just to piss him off more.)

Point is don't 'attack' a patron inside a casino. They will protect 'innocent' patrons strongly AND ban you AND support external actions against you. (In my case they provided an incident number and said the associated camera footage would remain accessible via that number for 18 months (IIRC))

Common curtesy is mandatory! What you allow, you will receive

How i handle people that are being rude; i look them directly in the eye, i wait until they are done being disrespectful. And i tell them that what they said was wrong, it was mean, and you wont accept it towards anyone. Period.

How to respond depends on the bully TBH.

I've had people hassle me about being tight, not sure I'd call it bullying. I responded by treating it as a joke, doubling down on accusations of folding good hands, saying things like "I'm waiting for suited Aces", or when the flop is Queen high "shouldn't have folded Queens" etc. I didn't change my play at all and it stopped. I guess they wanted me to open up and I just wouldn't. BTW this would get me barred from a high-stakes private game rather than my local casino donkey table, so YMMV. But yeah I just don't care if people call me tight, it's how I play so they're going to have to deal with it, and I have to deal with it getting mentioned.

I've had guys make personal remarks for no reason, so I've bitten back and gone after their hygeine, weight etc. Anything I think they might be senstive about.

I've had guys get bitchy and I've just ignored them and waited it out. Most especially if they just whining after losing a hand, I mentally give them a free pass for a bit.

End of the day, you get all sorts in a casino. Sometimes they'll give you a hard time and it's not really bullying but rather vigorous banter. Sometimes they're angry at the world and you just happen to be there, you can wait them out by ignoring them. Sometimes they are being dickheads and just need to know that you're not an easy target. I will say if someone is being super offensive, you can just call a supervisor and have them spoken to, but I wouldn't do that unless they are ridiculously out of line. It's probably easier to just change tables if someone is really getting to you.

Sounds like you need to work on your table talk. It is a skill. Many people come to the game for social reasons. If you’re a solid winning player and you have no social game, you can become tiresome to have around. If you spit a quality gibberish game, it can be entertaining and hypnotic to those that require interaction with those around them to stay interested. If all you are is a seat warmer, or chip stacker, it’s likely their way to try to get you to leave.