Online dating thread

about 2.9bn people apparently

I think they still have a niche user base.

I used to watch Aussie Rules Football but after I discovered the NRL I have no time for it.

Yes, NRL is my sport too. Which team do you follow?

I don't really follow a team. I spent some time in Paramatta so I tell people I am a life long Paramatta Eels fan.

how do i motivate lazy facebook'ers

Keep telling them the Storm is coming.

If you’re 50+ then that means you were there for the heyday in the 80s. It’s been fairly grim since then

I don't know if this actually happened to you or it's just an example, but your edit reeks of neediness, no wonder she doesn't respect you.

You're not in an exclusive relationship, she can text any guy she wants as long as she's not talking to you about it. I mean, if you asked her who she's texting and she said it's some other guy she's seeing, yeah that's ****ed up and you need to let her know that, but if you just happen to glance at her phone and see a guy's name, why would you care?

Also, you don't ask a girl you've been seeing to be your girlfriend.

You date as many girls as you can handle, and when one of them brings up the "talk" and that she wants to be in an exclusive relationship, then you make a decision.

You should read "The way of the superior man" by David Deida. Great ****ing book.

you seem really insecure?

so I spent 5 mins researching that book. My goodness!! I simply cannot conceive of being desperate or clueless or insecure enough to read a book full of that nonsense or being impressionable enough to buy into his core tenets. You do you and I totally subscribe to being able to learn and take learning from everything but using this as any kind of guide or bible seems bleak

here are some quotes

"if you are willing to discover and embrace your truth, lean through your fears, and give everything you’ve got, you can penetrate the world and your woman from the core of your being and bloom them into love without limit. You can ravish your woman so deeply that her surrender breaks your heart into light. You can press yourself into the world with such enduring love that the world opens and receives your deepest gifts.There is no essential difference between entering your woman’s feminine heart and entering fully into the world. Both forms of intercourse, sexual and worldly, require sensitivity, spontaneity, and a strong connection to deep truth in order to penetrate chaos and closure in a way that love prevails.

Neither woman nor world are predictable. They will often seem to resist your gifts and test your capacity to persist. And, just as surely, they will tenderly respond to the authenticity of your relaxed ministrations, the freedom expressed in your humor, and the invasion of your adamant love. They will open in love and receive you fully—only to resist and test you again, moments or days later. Neither woman nor world can be second-guessed, or fooled. They know when you are just dicking around. They want to receive you for real.There are two ways to deal with woman and world without compromising your true gifts or dribbling away the force of your deep being. One way is to renounce sexual intimacy and worldliness, totally dedicating yourself without distraction or compromise to the path you choose to pursue, free of the seemingly constant demands of woman and world.The other way is to “****” both to smithereens, to ravish them with your love unsheathed, to give your true gifts despite the constant tussle of woman and world, to smelt your authentic gifts in this friction of opposition and surrender, to thrust love from the freedom of your deep being even as your body and mind die blissfully through a crucifixion of inevitable pleasure and pain, attraction and repulsion, gain and loss. No gifts left ungiven. No limit to the depth of being. Only openness, freedom, and love as the legacy of your intercourse with woman and world.

If you are going to tryst with women and world at all, better to go all the way and ravish them from the depths of your true core, blooming them open with the wide gifts of your unrelenting heart. Otherwise, if you sheepishly penetrate them to gratify your own needs, your woman and the world will feel your lack of dedication, depth, and truth. Rather than yielding in love to your loving, they will distract you, suck your energy, and draw you into endless complications, so that your life and relationship become an almost constant search for release from constraint.

You can be a renunciate and live alone, apart from woman and world. But if you choose a life of sexual and worldly intercourse, you will feel trapped by woman and world unless you are free in the midst of “true ****,” yielding yourself into the giving, holding nothing back, dissolving all time in the open of love. Through thick and thin, this is the way of the superior man"

"A man abandons responsibility by expecting that his woman will always make her own decisions and then be accountable for the results. This expectation is a withholding of his masculine gift. It puts a woman in the position of magnifying her own masculine. It is good for some women to learn to animate their masculine capacity to make a decision and stick with it. But if a man abnegates his responsibility to provide his woman with the gift of masculine clarity and decisiveness, then she will become chronically sharp, angular, and distrustful of his love. She will cease surrendering in love with him, cease trusting his masculine capacity, and, instead, become her own man"

"For most men, their woman is replaceable. Harsh, but true. [...] Many times, in fact, you have probably fantasized about finding another woman even before you lose the one you have. Because a man’s priority is his mission, he will always gravitate to a woman whom he feels would most support his mission. If he feels another woman would enliven him and give him more energy for his work, he might desire her as an intimate partner.

However, you are lodged in the heart of your woman. [...] You are not replaceable in her perception. She does not frequently consider other options, as you probably do. [...] Your relationship with her is not only at the core of her life, but is also the main determinant of her mood.

If your woman has rejected her own feminine core [...] She will try to identify with her masculine side, attempting to de-prioritize you and your relationship. She will think that she must “live her own life” and put more energy into her own career, for instance. While it is obviously healthy for every man and woman to learn to become whole and independent, it is self-destructive for your woman to try to lessen the import of your relationship in her life. [...]

[...] Our culture has become so anti-feminine that many women are trying to deny their feminine core desires and adopt the masculine way of dedication to mission. By denying their feminine essence, such women are predisposing themselves to emptiness of heart, depression, and bodily symptoms of disease.

Likewise, you must not deny your woman’s feminine essence by feeling or saying to her, “Your whole life seems to revolve around our relationship! That’s not healthy. You should have your own life, your own direction, your own career and friends. Stop complaining about our intimate problems and get a life!"

While it is common sense that she should live a fulfilling and engaging life outside of your relationship, it is sexual wisdom to understand that her feminine essence will always hold the flow of love at its center. That’s just the way it is. This flow of love could be in direct relationship with the divine, although it is usually in relationship with a man.The desire for intimate loving is as central to your woman’s life as the mission toward freedom—financial, psychological, and spiritual—is to yours"

ultimate dick wetness, count me in

It’s disrespectful as **** to do that. Especially when it can be done in private.

And you absolutely ask a girl to be your girlfriend if you really like her.

That book is probably dumb af.

Lmao.

People bashing that book and my comments are the same people in this thread asking "she just texted/said this, what do I do"

But hey, the book is really dumb.

Why would you want to understand women better and improve your relationships when it's easier to just say "they're women, they're a mystery, that's how they are".

Just like poker, you don't need to improve, you're just unlucky.

I have no intimate knowledge about the specific book in question but those books tend to be filled with manosphere fluff.

The books I read also had lots of gold.

The difficulty came in separating out the gold from the fluff, though it was often fairly obvious what was fluffy nonsense.

Considering it was written in 1997 its going to be filled with an above average amount of manosphere fluff

my friend, I have slept with over 150 women, probably over 200 but I stopped counting long ago.

I promise you that I know what's going on

PW also has a baller avatar.

I never knew the exact number but did a countback when I got engaged to my wife/soontobeexwife at age 28 and was over 100. Lots of 'friend of S', 'girl from rugby tour' type memories. That was back in the dark ages when there was no technology to help us and we actually had to earn our roots by talking to girls in bars or hooking up with friends of friends.

ah...the good old days. the young fellas don't know how easy they have it

no doubt because you can penetrate the world and your woman from the core and they tenderly respond to the authenticity of your relaxed ministrations, the freedom expressed in your humor, the invasion of your adamant love. you “****” both women and world to smithereens, ravish them with your love unsheathed, smelt your authentic gifts in this friction of opposition and surrender.

you follow the way of the superior man.

is this like erotic novels but for men?

Doubling back here

You want to be lucky enough to fall in love with a woman so hard that no other woman matters (for a while)

In those rare instances you will be the one doing the chasing. Many people have never fallen in love. They don’t know what this feeling or experience is like. Girls that you like will not chase you, girls that you are dismissive of will be the ones to chase you

You don’t want to wind up with someone you don’t like enough to chase.

Follow your heart. Or your dick if your heart is cold.

been visiting old friends who are all now married

they're obviously super interested in the single life, they want to see the app, check it out - so these couples are now swiping on my behalf and then messaging those they match with

mind you these are couples doing it together and they're really trying to plan it out because they want to see "if they still got it"

many of these couples met on tinder so this isn't unknown territory

nearly unanimously shocked at how much it's changed - how all matches are low effort, how they seemingly get unmatched with out of the blue or how the matchees then never respond etc etc

been sobering and nice reminder that it's not so much a product of me losing skillz but rather a dynamic shift in the ecosystem

What if it's like that scene in Don't Mess with the Zohan where it's his heart AND dick acting in unison!?

I’ve only been on tinder and am off it now - are Bumble and Hinge similar in terms of this stuff?

Bumble is kinda like the OkCupid of the past. The hot people are on tinder. And people who wanna get with hot people are on tinder. Bumble is more like the JV squad , and they aren’t trying to **** on the first date. But the third date, sure. Kinder people on bumble, better sex and relationships from girls I met on tinder

I don’t have much exp with hinge, that will be my next endeavor