Funny words/definitions

Irony has nothing to do with being bittersweet.

checkmate doesn't mean the king is dead.

Saying hubris shows hubris.

Sweetbread is neither sweet or made of bread.

my past addiction to big words still haunts me

diction says a lot about you to people who don't know you that well.

do offal next

I learned this word from The Raven Bling Blang Blaow.

Wtf I may never say this word again.

Peruse is often used in the exact opposite of it's meaning. People often say something like, "I quickly perused over the document" thinking it means to lightly look at something, when in fact the meaning is to read something carefully and at length.

Thanks for memo. I didn't know this. My main reference is from Wayne's World after Wayne asks Benjamin if he can peruse the contract before him and Garth sign it.

peruse can actually mean both:

peruse
/pəˈɹuːz/
verb
(transitive) To examine or consider with care.
(transitive) To read completely.
(transitive, informal) To look over casually; to skim.

Are you positing it as a contronym?

Intercourse... we all do it on a daily basis, even the mute.

The plural of mongoose is mongooses, not mongeese.

thats neat. any others?

Ham is Hams... I am beflumexed that you didn't know this

The plural of buffalo is buffaloes, not buffalo.

Oh, give me a home where the buffaloes roam?

Potato... Potatoes.
:p

Oh, Idaho know how the potato grow...

I wish.

wishes

dana carvey is so good at garth, just look at his face, he never took a single scene off