Have good or bad vibrations at the table

Thank you for sharing your struggles openly Poker can be such a mentally taxing game, and it’s clear you’re doing a lot of self-reflection to try and break through this tough patch. That alone speaks volumes about your dedication to improvement.

Reading your post reminded me of some struggles I’ve faced in the past-both in poker and beyond. While I don’t play professionally anymore, I’ve worked a lot on my mindset, and there were lessons I wish I’d learned earlier when I was still grinding. I thought I’d share some insights that might resonate with what you’re going through.

One of the biggest hurdles I faced, both in poker and in life, was my own limiting beliefs. I used to internalise my struggles-believing that bad runs or tough breaks meant something about me as a player or a person. Over time, I realised that these were just meanings I had attached to past experiences, which had created limiting ideas about myself.

What helped me overcome this was learning to reperceive those past experiences. I started taking action in the present to “prove” those beliefs wrong and replace them with healthier, self-serving ones. For example, In the past someone might have told me I was not good enough, and this really hurts, today I am equipped on how to deal with a person who speaks to me like this and I can stand up for myself. This gives me the room to make myself vulnerable in new situations that I would have avoided in the past, and ultimately grow. This process requires self-awareness, but it’s incredibly empowering. The mind is so much stronger than we realise when we take responsibility for it.

Another critical insight I’ve gained is that much of our frustration stems from trying to control things that aren’t within our power. In poker, so much is outside of our control: the cards, the runouts, the behavior of others. But what we can control-our mindset, preparation, and decision-making-is often more powerful than it seems.

As a professional, I struggled with this. I didn’t take full responsibility for the things I could control, which left me feeling powerless when things didn’t go my way. Looking back, I see now that identifying what is and isn’t in our control is key. When we truly focus on what’s within our grasp, it becomes easier to let go of the things that aren’t.

One specific way my lack of internal control manifested was in how I played. I found myself adjusting my playstyle to avoid situations that emotionally tormented me-like losing a big flip late in a tournament or taking a bad beat in a massive cash pot. That avoidance didn’t just limit my growth as a player; it also reinforced my fear of those situations, making them even harder to face in the future.

Recognising this pattern was painful, but it taught me an important lesson: The things we avoid are often where our growth lies. Learning to face those uncomfortable spots with curiosity rather than fear is a game-changer-not just in poker but in life.

A mindset trap I see often (and fell into myself) is the need for short-term results to validate our efforts. It’s so common to feel low on self-esteem during a rough patch, and the temptation is to seek quick wins or external validation to feel better. But poker is a long game, and relying on short-term approval often leads to burnout or frustration.

When I work with players now, I encourage them to take a step back and ask: Why are you playing this game? What do you want to achieve? Gaining clarity on your motives and focusing on the long-term process of growth can help you endure tough times. It also allows you to celebrate small wins, like staying disciplined or learning from mistakes, which reduces the pressure to constantly “prove” yourself through results.

If I were to suggest a way to reset your mindset right now, I’d start with unpacking your motives for playing. Dedicate yourself to growing both as a player and a person. Recognise the areas where you’ve grown already-no matter how small-and celebrate them. This might sound simple, but acknowledging progress can ease the tension of tough runs, making it less likely to influence your play negatively.

Finally, I’d encourage you to view the challenges poker throws your way as opportunities to learn more about yourself. When you feel disempowered or think negatively about yourself, try asking, “Why do I feel this way?” Often, those answers hold the key to breaking free from the limiting beliefs that keep us stuck.

I know it’s easier said than done, but the fact that you’re reflecting on these struggles shows that you’re already on the right track.

Thanks again for sharing your post-it’s a reminder of how universal these struggles are, and I hope some of this resonates with you. I’d love to hear your thoughts or what’s been working (or not working) for you so far.

Tx very much for your post. I'm still trying to process and work on some things, so wish me luck and GL at the tables too for you!