Use your head, Ainslie, not you heart

200 No limit in Ignition. Roughly equal effective stacks of 100BB.

I have pocket aces, and I am barreling. Catch a four-bet caller preflop, he then calls a pot sized bet on the flop (rags but with two hearts), and I shove when a Jack hits on the turn. He calls with KQh. Since I have the Ace of hearts, I calculate him as having a 16% chance of winning, but a heart hits the river and he wins.

Now my head knows this is variance. Fact of the matter is I have been pretty lucky with pocket aces over the past 20K hands. Also, Poker Tracker indicates great luck with all-in hands in general.

But my heart will not buy it. I leave the table and stew.

Why did he call the shove? (Heart)

If the cards were face up would you not want him to? (Head)

Back and forth. Heart is winning to the point where I wish I were a drinker. He had no business with the call on any street.

You wanted him to call (Head).

STFU

Two days later, again with equal 100BB stacks, I start barreling with AK off. On the flop, after a big bet by me when an ace hits the board, opponent shoves and I call. Board is Ah, Th, 5c. Again opponent has KQs, this time with nearly a coin flip chance of winning, because of the gut shot straight draw. He blanks turn and river, and I drag the pot.

Vindicated! Beat the same hand! I am joyful.

And this is the whole problem with attitude and emotion that I fight as a player. Although emotion did not slow me down in these two hands, I often play too timidly, for fear of being beaten. For example, I check behind somebody on the turn and miss the value bet. Same on the river.

I guess recognizing a personal leak is a step toward fixing it, but that is hard for me. I have actually progressed to the point where when I realize I am acting timid, I leave the table. So yay!

But man