Altercations at the table

BUMP

Please share more!

This is probably the best one on video 😃

If you've ever seen those "power slap" contests, saw basically the poker table equivalent of that at 2-5.
College kid was yapping, called another guy a ****** and a fish, dude stood up, walked over and knocked bro clean out with an open-hander to the jaw. Ambulance and fire came.
Permaban for slapper, day ban for slapee but he never came back.

Saw a guy pull out one of those expandable batons and chase another dude around the table until the redcoats got there. Neither party was truly motivated to get at it, but there was a 2 or 3 second instant of anger where the baton guy probably would've yoked the other guy if he had caught him.

Saw a gangster in the big blind flash a gun in his waistband after being shown a bluff by an early raiser (in a pot of blinds). Everyone played it cool but obviously extremely nervous, floor saw it and called security. The coats showed up in a trot, one with a taser, the other Glock drawn and at low ready. Table scattered, dude got put out.

I will die on this hill- there is literally no place on this earth where you will have a broader cross-section of society than a poker room... and thats a huge part of its appeal.
You will have CEOs sitting at tables with actual murderers, having casual conversations about football. Its a big part of its draw, but something to always beware of when you're playing. You're sitting at a table with someone whose values on violence may be quite different than yours and if you don't understand that world and its parameters, beware, because its different than the cul-de-sac you grew up in.

i was waiting for a post like this! thanks for sharing. i'll die on that same hill with you.

spot on

While I agree with your sentiment about poker being a cross-section of society, something especially so when playing small stakes in Las Vegas, or Panama or elsewhere in Central America, I think you overstate the point about "literally no place on earth".

I suggest that the DMV, a McDonalds, and pretty much any airport, will provide a more broad cross-section of society generally than does a live poker venue and will also include people under the age of 21.

Do rich people go to the DMV or McDonald's? I haven't been to McDonald's in 25 years or so myself.

Disagree.
Fast food and public commercial air travel are heavily filtered for the top/bottom ends of society.
Yes, Warren Buffett eats Egg McMuffins and we all have to go get a drivers license, I suppose you could say a courthouse would also have a similar cross section, what with the contract disputes happening on the 3rd floor and the felony cases on the 1st floor, but that's an autistic argument and the point stands.

As far as voluntary social environs go, Poker room has the broadest cross section of the top and bottom of society's strata, at any given time, that will see wildly different people in very close social proximity who would otherwise have nothing to do with each other, or actively avoid each other, yet for that one glorious session, sit together as one, trying to gank each other's cash.

Nothing else like it.

The greatest example of peaceful assimilation of races and cultures is a poker room. I’ve been going to public/private poker rooms for more than half a century, and I have never one time seen any racial incidents. White, black, brown, and yellow people all sitting/working together peacefully. A study in how people should try and get along.

You beat me to it! I love how Redbeard not only completely ragdolls him, but is having such an easy time beating the bully down that he casually throws in some smack talk. The suplex onto the dealer was epic. Farm boy strength > steroid strength!

Haha, DMV visits are always a nice wakeup call... I sometimes feel like I walked into the Jerry Springer show.

Small town Wal-Marts are also pretty interesting.

Lol no, I'm not wealthy, I just don't waste money on fast food. I do go to the DMV whenever I have to, but I try to do as much online as possible.
I figured the richest people would have someone else go for them.
And that they would go to nicer restaurants than McDonald's.

no way you thought rich people didn't have to identify themselves at the DMV. i suppose they could send a paid doppelganger in to do the job...

Several years ago, I'm walking into the poker room and I get seated immediately. I had to go to the cage to get chips at this cardroom, so as I'm standing in line, these 2 rather large gentleman start having a disagreement about $500 right behind me. I'm trying to ignore them and not pay them any attention. It's not my business.

"GIVE ME MY F'N MONEY" shouts Large bearded man #1.

"YOU'LL GET IT TOMORROW" says Large bearded man #2

"YOU LYING SACK OF ****, DON'T MAKE ME..."

and that's when Large Bearded Man #2 is pushed into me, while large bearded man #1 pounced on number 2. I fell to the ground, having a rather large man pushed into me while my back is facing them.

Security shows up, one dude is detained and arrested/cops are called... Other dude is taken out on a stretcher. Poker room has about 8-10 tables going, everything stops and everyone is rubber necking the situation for approximately 30-60 seconds, then the games resume.

Security asks me if I'm okay, I'm fine.. I start flexing my hand as if it were sore from me breaking my fall. Poker room manager prints me out a comp for the steakhouse as a goodwill gesture. I accept it.

I skip poker, take my buddy to the steak house, i get the biggest, most expensive cut on the menu... and we called it a night.

That's the best I got. Not a winner, but I got a steak dinner.

I can't imagine people like Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos going to the DMV. Maybe they do have to get their photos taken though, unless they just never drive themselves. Also can't imagine Donald Trump has been to the DMV in a very long time, though maybe I just don't have a good imagination.

Damn, I only ever get a chicken dinner!

Good story, glad you survived.

I still say re-raise like the robot did.

We have an ongoing joke in our private game about how the black guys dominate in February, since it's black history month. Someone even set up a timer with a countdown to Feb. 1st. Hilarious.

Saw a drunk dude get a bad beat and flip the table over. The little side drink tables, that is.

Saw a fight at Philly live last summer.. 2-2 PLO game, was pretty violent. Security didn’t intervene for quite some time

Coming back from break in a tournament, a friend and I saw a shouting altercation that escalated to one guy pulling out a fork and stabbing the other in the face. Not crazy hard, but it definitely broke the skin.

When I sat back down, the stabber had been moved to our table and explained he did it because the dude was wearing a turban and it was a big no-no for their religion to do that while playing. Stabee was a couple tables over and they got into a shouting match shortly after.

Sounds like a no-no to even be gambling in said religion if this is the case...

Craziest thing I have seen was someone berating a middle aged woman for blind raising 20x 1 full orbit in a 5/10 game. Shortly after, her husband came over and told her he won some invite only Aria high roller tournament (freeroll) to the original One Drop. He was the dude who gave Helmuth his seat. Original berator then said something along the lines of "oh so you REALLY don't care about money" - kinda funny