Super Bowl 58: #3 Kansas City Chiefs vs #1 San Francisco 49ers (-1)
Kansas City Chiefs: 11-6, AFC West Champion
WC: 26-7 v Miami
Divisional: 27-24 @ Buffalo
Conference: 17-10 @ Baltimore
Super Bowl Record: 3-2
Last Appearance: Super Bowl 57 (38-35 W v Philadelphia)
How they got here:
If you followed along Kansas City's offense has done everything imaginable to ruin this for Kermit and the Swifties. So many drops, Toney lining up offsides to force them to play on the road, despite an incredible defense this really seemed like the year Kansas City was finally going to be not remotely close to the best team in the AFC. Then they get into the playoffs and put in some ****ing work. Mahomes scored 14 points in the first 2 drives, a field goal since and that was good enough to beat the ****ing Ravens at home. Pretty eye-opening no matter how you look at it.
Mahomes played on the road in the playoffs for the first time in his career (which in it of itself is an insane stat for a guy who is now playing in his 4th Super Bowl) and they put in work. They played on the road for the second time in his career. And they put in work. Patrick Mahomes remains the only active NFL player with equity to go down as the greatest to ever play.
San Francisco 49ers: 12-5, NFC West Champion
WC: Bye
Divisional: 24-21 v Green Bay
Conference: 34-31 v Detroit
Super Bowl Record: 5-2
Last Appearance: Super Bowl 54 (31-20 L v Kansas City)
Last Win: Super Bowl 29 (49-26 v San Diego)
How they got here:
Holy ****ing ****.
The Niners started the season 5-0 and in doing so looked like a generationally dominant team that was going to run away with the NFL.
Then they lost Trent and Deebo, lost 3 straight and looked like total ass doing so causing everyone to assume they were frauds.
Then they won 6 straight and in doing so looked like a generationally dominant team and Brock ****ing Purdy was the runaway betting favorite to win the MVP.
Then Christmas happened.
But all's well that ends well and they made the playoffs as the #1 seed.
Then the Green Bay game happened.
For 50 minutes Bork played like I would and the Niners looked finished. Then he pulled a hell of a comeback out of his ass and they won.
Then the Detroit game happened.
I literally just watched this game a couple hours ago and I still can't explain to you what happened and how except that somehow someway the Niners won. And that's cool!
What makes this Super Bowl so compelling
I can see why people hate both of these franchises for a thousand different reasons, but brace yourself for what will be the most watched televised sporting event (possibly most watched television event of any kind) in American history. And it probably lives up to that. Obviously the Swift element is...a thing. And we are going to have 2 weeks of lead-up for that which will be...a thing. But put that aside for a second and there are stories galore.
Whatever you think of Brock Purdy, last year he was the last pick of the draft. This year he is starting in the Super Bowl. Could he have pulled this off if any other team drafted him? Of course not. He fell ass backwards into an epic situation and the Niners fell ass backwards into a lucky draft pick. Trading 3 1s to move up in the most overrated draft in history only to have your franchise QB be some random guy from Iowa who only got the job because the two guys in front of him went down? If this weren't shoved down your throat for the better part of a year and a half it's the coolest story since Kurt Warner, bagman, who only got the job because the two guys in front of him went down. Btw, this time last year the guy broke his ****ing elbow and yet here we are.
Holy **** Patrick Mahomes. 6 years as a starter. Has made it to the AFC Championship 6 times. Has made it to the Super Bowl 4 times. Has a chance to get his 3rd ring and the ****er is only 28. He won't have Brady level longevity but we are witnessing absolute greatness like most of us have not seen in our lifetime. It sucks if you are a fan of any other team but the Chefs but still.
Rumors circulating this may be the last ride of the Walrus. Historically the man is both massive and massively underrated. His work with Philadelphia was both amazing and unlucky. His work with Kansas City has been nothing short of legendary. 4 Super Bowl appearances in 5 years with the potential for 3 wins. I would argue he is the actual greatest coach in NFL history.
Which is a good segue into the modern day iteration of Philadelphia Walrus. Ever since the Falcons implosion I would argue no coach in the NFL has more more criticism despite more success than Kyle Shanahan. The guy is an objectively brilliant offensive mind and in his 7 years as Niners coach they have gone to the NFC Championship 4 of the last 5 years and twice have made it to the Super Bowl. And they did this with QB luminaries like the Womp and the Bork. Kyle schemes like nobody in the NFL can but every time the Niners fell short it all fell on him despite the fact that they overperformed to get where they were in the first place.
This game is a rematch of Super Bowl 54 which still hurts my ****ing soul (Bosa was held on 4th and Tyreek, never believe different). These two teams don't have much history but the history they do have is massive. SB 54 kickstarted the Chiefs dynasty and the failure of Womp to close it kickstarted the Niners neverending hunt for a franchise QB that went from maybe Brady to maybe Rodgers to maybe Lance to....Purdy? Lots of trajectories changed 4 years ago and we come full circle.
Why the Chiefs will win the Super Bowl
This defense is good. Like, really good. Like, really really good. Pacheco has stepped up and the Niners run defense has been horrendous so far in the playoffs. Plus, you know, that Patrick Mahomes guy. Mahomes smoked the Ravens for the first 2 drives on the road which is as comparable as there is to a theoretical matchup with the Niners defense. The Niners have been pretty lax the entire playoffs to start the game and 1. both games are at home and 2. neither teams they faced are as good as Kansas City. There is no margin of error for lazy bullshit and if the Niners bring that energy to the Super Bowl this is going to be a ****ing rout.
Why the 49ers will win the Super Bowl
The Niners have an overwhelming amount of talent. The biggest knock against them is that they could not play from behind and the entire playoffs they had to come from behind. Were they lucky against the Lions? Absolutely. But they proved that even down 17 points they have a QB who is not going to be overwhelmed by the moment and a defense that can still step up when needed even if they failed catastrophically. As good as the Chiefs defense is they have yet to face an offense like the 49ers with as much efficiency and talent across the board as they have. Plus this defense is ludicrously talented. They may take 30 minutes to get jumpstarted but once they do they are locked in.
Gentlemen, let us Super Bowl.
My parents use to take us to the Luxor and it seemed cool as a kid. As I grew older I realized it was decidedly uncool and was just circus circus but on the other side of the strip
I tend to think I overcompensate as an adult for my hotel stays to spoil myself cuz my parents never would when I was a child
I might need to talk to a therapist for this
If I were your therapist, I'd wonder why your parents were taking you to LV multiple times. Seems like the WOAT place to vacation with kids.
My parents use to take us to the Luxor and it seemed cool as a kid. As I grew older I realized it was decidedly uncool and was just circus circus but on the other side of the strip
I tend to think I overcompensate as an adult for my hotel stays to spoil myself cuz my parents never would when I was a child
I might need to talk to a therapist for this
I'd just take what you would pay a therapist and keep on spoiling yourself. Probably cheaper in the long run.
Just went on the Luxor website and can get a room for Super Bowl weekend for 459/night
Edit: but then you’re staying at the Luxor
That's not that bad. I was in LV during some random weekend last Oct, and Luxor was over $800/night, IIRC. It was just that one Sat night. I was going to stay at Bellagio, but even after whatever discount the poker host was gonna get me it was going to be ~$1300/night there. It was the weirdest thing. Everything was ridic expensive for just that night. The Friday and Sunday were perfectly reasonable, but the Saturday was nuts.
The high price at Bellagio prompted me to search for other options. Everything was crazy, even shitty motels going for $400/night. There were a couple of 1 bedroom Airbnbs for $600/night, but when I made contact, I was told they were no longer available. All major strip hotels were around $800+/night.
While I was there that week, I asked every local, "So what's going on Saturday that is making everything so insane". I never got the same answer twice. No one knew what it was.
I ended up finding a newly listed Airbnb about 20 min north of the strip for $100 and snap called. I suspect host was unaware of the massive inflation for that one day. Only ended up crashing there for a 6 hour power nap before I went back to the poker, so it was completely fine.
I still have no idea what the **** happened.
Right now Spirit shows $300 roundtrip Saturday afternoon, back 1AM Monday morning.
If that's still available on Friday night I might just do it.
If I were your therapist, I'd wonder why your parents were taking you to LV multiple times. Seems like the WOAT place to vacation with kids.
The arcade scene was way cooler years ago
I’m Iranian, and if you walk the strip at any given time you’ll wonder why you see casinos broadcasting some random ass middle eastern concert
Anyway, the reason for that is cuz we’re ****ing degenerates
did ya hear what i said, ton'? i says to the guy forty-niners? more like forty-whiners! heh heh heh heh
The arcade scene was way cooler years ago
I’m Iranian, and if you walk the strip at any given time you’ll wonder why you see casinos broadcasting some random ass middle eastern concert
I haven't actually walked the strip for any significant length in decades. It's hot out there. Drive/cab/uber FTW.
I did walk between Cosmo and Bellagio a couple of times. That might be it.
Which is it- great sex, or a great super bowl? If you get both; praise the lord.
I'm driving up Friday night for 3 nights. Got a great deal on a room, but no chance I'm paying for game tickets, even if they drop by 95%. The cheapest thing on SeatGeek is $7800 with fees lol
Evidently the Events Center downtown is the place to be. That's what i've seen repeated everywhere.
Right now Spirit shows $300 roundtrip Saturday afternoon, back 1AM Monday morning.
If that's still available on Friday night I might just do it.
I flew Spirit once. The keyword is once. There won't be a twice.
Although I suppose if you're flying with nothing more than a wad of cash and an ID then YOLO. It'll make your story that much more interesting if you survive. 😃
I've been checking prices every week or so in case the Lions made it and some people I know wanted to go and they have regularly been going down, the only time I noticed them trending up was when the Lions were beating 49ers.
I'd assign a low percentage to this outcome (and for the avoidance of doubt, he didn't play "well" against Green Bay, imo). If Purdy gets there to a good game it's going to be very difficult to see how Kansas keep pace. Purdy could have a "meh" game and SF win, but I think it's mostly Purdy balls out = SF win; Purdy struggles = KC win.
I think we're going to have to wait until 2025, maybe 2026 to get the definitive answer on Purdy. I reckon he will be proven as a limited ~replacement level starter, once he has to get paid and the insane structural advantage he has in SF starts to age out. Until we find out either way, it's the most awful discourse in sports.
Purdy having a stinker is where the real potential lols are to be found on Sunday, however...
I flew Spirit once. The keyword is once. There won't be a twice.
Although I suppose if you're flying with nothing more than a wad of cash and an ID then YOLO. It'll make your story that much more interesting if you survive. 😃
Maybe KC - LV is a positive outlier for Spirit or I got extremely lucky but I've never had big issues with Spirit on that route. I usually don't fly with luggage though. Not domestically and not internationally.
OTOH, since 2020 I've collected at least $2000 in cash or travel certificates every year as compensation for delayed transatlantic flights.
I think we're going to have to wait until 2025, maybe 2026 to get the definitive answer on Purdy. I reckon he will be proven as a limited ~replacement level starter, once he has to get paid and the insane structural advantage he has in SF starts to age out. Until we find out either way, it's the most awful discourse in sports.
Maybe 2026??? If he wasn't Mr Irrelevant the discourse wouldn't exist.
Probably the same. What would the discourse be if it was Trey Lance doing what he's doing?
