*** 2024 Mega Thread - NC/LC NSFW ***
ANNOUNCEMENT
Due to budget cuts, it has been decided that BBV will have only one LC/NC thread for 2024. Opening more threads in 2024 will result in infractions, bans, burnenings, etc.
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first david carridine, now morph, too many souls taken too early due to forbidden pleasure
RIP Morph. Who will write the eulogy?
Eff it. Here's a last ditch attempt to revive him. If not successful at least we know he's dead in the water. Here's the long delayed, not awaited, the ultimate
Spoiler
ACCIDENT LIST
(Warning: Long. LC/NC. Graphic. Proceed at own risk)
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1. Long time promised
2. Not delivered
3. Like a true BBVer
4. But it is coming finally
5. The list
6. The mist
7. The ultimate
8.
Spoiler
9. ACCIDENT LIST
10.
Spoiler
11. Warning. No poker content here
12. It was not for lack of trying
13. Also, no cam girls
14. Prolly KF will ban me immediately
15. Ah wait, maybe I still miss a few quadrirrion infarct points
16. So here it goes
17. As you know I’m on the move frequently, but I guess you could call it summer holidays
18. So I arrived via the city where the Frank is gone
19. Looked like 20 years ago on first sight
20.
Spoiler
21. This will be my list with the highest Frankfurt content ever
22. Prolly
23. Morph is all excite
24. Prolly
25. If he’s not dead already
26. It was an accident tho
27. The OG plan was to directly drive to Bavarianmöller, spend around one week dere, meet family and friends, then fly to Maltamöller for some Mediterranean holiday, playing lots of pokers and what else for one week, short layover where the Frank is gone, and back to Fragrantharbormöller
28. Spoiler: I never made to Maltesemöller
29. So I can’t tell how it is or da poker games dere
30. It was an accident
31. That part of driving directly to Bavarianmöller was accomplished
32. And the next days were quite uneventful which was good
33. The most exciting thing was some bridge construction
34. There was an old wooden bridge over a creek which is kind of our only access to the main road
35. It happens that it was flooded, then you had to take a quite crappy detour through a high elevation mud road
36. So it was more heavily used than fish’s cam girls
37. They said the renovation would take three days
38. Spoiler: It was still not completed when I departed two weeks later
39. That’s Deutsche Bahn, ahh engineering for you
40. Overrated
41. Full of accidents
42. Anyways, so on Sheepday there was a bday party of an old friend
43. I hadn’t seen him in a long time
44. I thought I would meet moar peeps that I knew
45. But other than that the party was all fun an stuff
46. Late at night, we are about to wrap up shortly anyways
47. I sat on a different table, kind of uneven Bavarianmöller countryside landscape
48. T -15minutes or something some other guy fell of his chair cos of dis
49. Obv no problem
50. I can’t remember exactly, I think I just tried to grab my beer or something
51. I fell off the chair and rolled over two or three times
52. Well at first I thought maybe it wasn’t that bad, just a bruise and it would get better soon
53. Well, I kinda noticed immediately that there was something wrong
54. I couldn’t hold my beer with the right hand, was all shaking
55. Anyways, it wouldn’t [strike]of[/strike] have made any difference cos the damage was already done
56. But there was some intermediate period of stupidity when I thought it was going to go away
57. Then came that
58.
Spoiler
59. Thanks Obama
60. It was an accident
61. It seems far away now but
62.
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63. Seriously, I recommend everyone not to break their shoulder, the pain was unheard of
64. Prolly punishment for all the sins I committed
65. Thanks Obama
66. It was an accident
67. Anyways, at the emergency admission in the local hospital Sheepday night
68. Confirmed that I broke my shoulder in the WOAT way
69. Thanks to Morph
70. Do you want to see the pain?
71. It was an accident
72.
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73. So I’m no expert but I was told the left parts are supposed to be connected
74. Or like the HK doc showed me later, he took that wooden spoon and twisted it on both sides until it broke
75. “That’s what happened to you”
76. It was an accident
77. Too severe to be treated conservatively, I was informed of my options of having the surgery there or fly to HK and have it there
78. But I was like, what tf are you on about, no way I can fly to HK with that level of pain
79.
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80. Well, I kept it under control mostly with teh use of plenty of painkillers and Bavarian beers
81. Which didn’t help my metabolic values, they were completely terrible when I got the surgery
82. Not sure if moar of the accident or the use of plenty of beers, painkillers and sleeping pills
83. Fortunately my brother came back, he came all the way from Viennamöller
84. He was there the week before and then went to Viennamöller to his wife, but came right back and stayed all week while I was in the hospital
85. Good to have a caring brother
86. While I have to state that my father was mostly completely useless and almost needed moar help than me because of the happenings
87. Don’t get old folks, dis is not recommended either, it is quite worrying actually
88. Actually speaking of which the emergency dept, aside from me, was mostly filled with alc and drug victims
89. Well, I suppose that’s normal on a Sheepday night, not worrying
90. Ofc prolly according to Söderama, that doesn’t exist in Bavarianmöller
91.
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92. Well I don’t know what that surgery does to your body exactly
93. But I can tell you I woke up Tuesday evening, the pain was already better, but I was completely unable to stand on my feet or move my right arm up one inch
94. Well, they got me a painkiller catheter, that I just needed to press
95. No, it didn’t make you high, just local anaesthetic
96. If they give you something that makes you high at a Germaniac hospital, you better make your peace with the higher beings
97. Anyways, seems I’m a survivor, my condition improved rapidly
98. Ofc you’re always a survivor until you’re not
99. I was even kinda sentimental about the hospital
100. It is the place of my birth
101. It was also the place of my Zivi
102. Only Morph is old and local enough to know what that is
103. It will prolly also be the place of my death
104. But let’s not talk about that
105. If you are on the correct side, you actually have a majestic view over my home town from the hospital
106. Obv I was in the accident surgery dept and had this majestic view
107.
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108. Constructionsitemöller
109. Thanks Obama
110. Well, it had a nice sunset
111. Can confirm Germaniac construction site workers are still the same as always, they start early but they finish earlier, even earlier on Friyays, and just forget about seeing them on the weekend or beyond core hours
112. Anyways, we lost the war so what do you expect from us?
113. Accident lists prolly
114. I was busy with that guy
115.
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116. Artromot-S3 FTW
117. It will take over se world shortly
118. Prolly
119. Want moar confirmation that I was in a Bavarian hospital
120.
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121. Jesus was dere.
122. Unfortunately that part below is not a working AC like you would expect from a proper Germaniac site
123. Third floor, early August, Bavarianmöller, the Morphblaming was strong
124. Fortunately my neighbor seemed to be trained not only in tractors from which he fell
125. But also advanced ventilation techniques
126. Unfortunately we shared the remote, he seemed to really like these court shows
127. I blame Morph
128. It’s all made up BS anyways, in Germany at least…
129. But I also survived that
130. After the accident
131. The last two days I was alone
132. It was kinda comfy actually
133. 100 TV and 100 radio channels from round se world, incl. the techno channel and the DnB channel
134. It was not superexpensive either
135. Underrated medical tourism site
136. But anyways, it is better to leave than stay
137. I was released on the next Sheepday
138. My brother collected me, but he already stayed like one week longer than planned, had to leave for his wife
139. So I wasn’t staying with my fathermöller who was still in worse shape than me
140. I made the spontaneous decision
141. I sat on the train
142. And left for the mysterious place
143.
Spoiler
144. Well grammar doesn’t appear to be their strong suit
145. But they have a lot of international shops
146.
Spoiler
147. Actually, I didn’t go there directly
148. On the train I found out
149. My release day
150. was also the day of the effin Christopher Street Day in the city where the Frank is gone
151. Don’t get me wrong I’m all for tolerance, everyone can put their thingy in wherever they like
152. But that wasn’t exactly what I needed on the day of my release
153. I stayed two days in Bad Homburgmöller
154. No pics, it was very uneventful
155. The age average there is like twice of mine anyways
156. I wasn’t allowed to do much of anything anyways
157. It was an accident
158. Anyways, finally made it to the city where the Frank is gone
159. And I visited all the famous tourist spots
160. What is this?
161. You enter a nondescript road
162.
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163. At least if you follow google maps, which is not optimal
164.
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165. What is that?
166. Is it a boy?
167. Is it a plane?
168. Morph knows
169. It’s the effin Schnitzelinder
170. Secret footage
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171.
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172. There’s no shortage of Schnitzels it seems
173. You can guess which one I had
174.
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175. So it was not the best Schnitzel I ever had
176. Prolly
177. But it was very solid
178. It was no accident
179. And Texas-sized portions
180. In solid 70s Germany garden furniture
181. So what moar do you want?
182. I also visited a friend the last day
183. Who moved back from effin HK
184.
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185. To effin Aschaffenburgmöller
186. Nice small city anyways
187. Unfortunately I couldn’t make it to
188. The one and only
189. the incredible
190. Sport- und Wellnessbad Kelsterbach
191. I wasn’t allowed in such facilities yet cos of the surgery wound
192. I’ll spare you from that
193. It was an accident
194. Flying back to HK, cos of the accident, I took the liberty to upgrade myself to the front of the plane
195. Was easier than expected, I just placed the lowest possible bid, was accepted sometime later
196. Thanks Morphhansa
197. I wish I could say I used the facilities well
198. But you know me
199. Do you know what’s also happening in Germanmöller these days?
200. Dis
201.
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202. Hey, 100% legal in Germanmöller now
203. I thought this day was never going to come
204. But I was wrong
205. And it was implemented through massive resistance
206. Mainly by the most unlikely peep
207.
Spoiler
208. But whatever, he succeeded where many others failed, he’s a true hero of the people now, his tale will be told long after he’s gone
209. Obv I had to celebrate this occasion by doing way too much in liquid form
210. I already fell asleep in the lounge
211. And slept the first half of the flight right through in upright position
212. And the second half in horizontal position
213. I can’t really tell you how the entertainment options were
214. But hey it was a comfortable seat
215. I can appreciate that
216. Anyways, finally arrived in HKmöller
217. I was mainly busy moving my home
218. Dis is a lot of fun with a dysfunctional shoulder and in sweltering HKmöller August, I can tell you dis much
219. However, I was also at the doc
220. He confirmed all the dirty secrets
221. That the Germaniac docs wanted to hide
222.
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223. I have awakened
224. I am transformed
225. Resistance is futile
226. They said the metal parts can be taken out after 6 months
227. Obv that’s just a plot to implant moar
228. I have seen the movies
229. I know moar than you
230. I made my way back to Frankfurtmöller
231. To take over world supremacy
232. I was at the Schnitzelinder
233.
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234. The Chicken tikka bites were excellent
235. I guess he is best doing Indian stuff after all
236. It’s shocking, who would [strike]of[/strike] have thought?
237. But of course there is only one place where the world can be taken over
238. So I planned my return
239. To the one, the only
240. Sport- und Wellnessbad Kelsterbach
241. But what is that?
242.
Spoiler
243.
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244. There has been an accident
245. A fire
246. It walks with me
247. I guess
248. The outer saunas are dysfunctional
249. It was an accident
250. The Sport- und Wellnessbad Kelsterbach without the outer Saunas are ofc moar like a man with broken shoulders, no good for much of anything
251. So that had to delayed
252. To be continued
253. That is all for now, heathens
Epic.
That list is nothing short of a masterpiece, Mr. FWWM. Sheep thanks you for your contribution.
Well done, Fire!
143. We're all hot dogs.
Spoiler
And not jelly donuts.
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jfk would have given helen a handy after she paid for dinner
Helen's not crossthreadworthy.
But crossthreadworthy might be German word worthy.
We don't even have a proper word for crossthread. Or thread for that matter, mostly the English word is used. Maybe Morph would know, if he didn't die too soon. It's tragic, RIP.
No long German word for an esoteric concept?
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I don't see what the proplem is. Morph was super old, he lived a long and happy life, and died a natural death amongst his loved ones. We should celebrate his life, not mourn his passing.
Ah, he was prolly killed by Denmarkian socialism.
Probably
Sammy's hot wife is pregnant
Congrats Sammy.
Sammy's happy
Thank you Fidstar.
This will be another adtion to our joined kingdom.
congrats, who's the lucky father?
Fuck you
Congrats Sammy
It wasn't me
Spoiler
prolly
You know I was thinking about it today, since our resident German died of socialism I'm kind of the head researcher here. You could use threadübergreifenswert which is derived from threadübergreifend. Germaniacs will understand that, prolly
Who are you, and what are you doing in BBV?
