Etiquette Question: Cocktail waitresses during hands

You get the tap on the shoulder, hand her a tip and say thank you, then go back to the hand. It is no more than a 2 second interaction. 2 seconds.

Look, I'll be quick to say that every person is different. Things that bother one person doesn't affect another in the least. But something like this should be simple and never an issue for the player or waitress. Your job is poker, her job is serving and both should be cognizant of the other's responsibilities. She can't just stand there for minutes while you make a decision because she has hundreds of players to take care of. If you have issues with the possibility of being interrupted, then get drinks while on a break.

Live poker is a very social endeavor and many have difficulty transitioning from online to live. But some of this you have to figure out for yourself.

You seem to have a lot of problems at the poker table.

There is no requirement to tip the waitstaff. The etiquette of the situation is the waitstaff depends on tips to earn a living so it is expected that you will tip them. As said above, this should be a 2 second interaction. You should be observant enough to see the server arrive with your drink and get the tip ready, even if you are in the middle of a decision. If that is beyond your capabilities, then have the tip out, separated from your chip stack, so you can just hand it to the server when you order.

The answer to that is non-poker related and I doubt you want to hear it.

Pre-tipping while ordering is a perfectly fine solution to the problem. The other acceptable option is to stop ordering drinks while you play.

Being rude to the waitress takes the same amount of time as just giving her the tip and most likely impacts your concentration significantly more.

Really good waitresses in a poker room will not deliver your drink while you are in the middle of a hand.

At Foxwoods for many years waitresses got to choose where they worked and in the poker room they were incredible because that is all they did. Then Foxwoods changed their policy and we got waitresses in the poker room who basically knew nothing about poker and they started doing the drink delivery during hands. Interrupting play so they could optimize their deliveries. This was very annoying and in situations like yours I would sometimes tell them to wait until my hand was over. Sometimes though I would just tip them quickly and get back to the hand. It would depend on the action and whether or not I needed to view what was going on with the other players in the hand.

In your situation I would have told the waitress to stop tapping me on the shoulder that I was in the middle of a hand. Without turning my head. Then when the hand was over I would quickly give the waitress her tip. Sometimes it took me a few hands before I could get up because if I didn't fold preflop then I wouldn't have enough time to do the tip thing. But at Foxwoods I rarely had to do that because they would just not drop the drink off until I wasn't in the middle of a hand. And yes once or twice I never got my drink because the waitress either forgot or gave it to somebody else... There are some waitresses who can deliver drinks to a table without me having to turn around and I will reach back to them with my hand holding a $1 bill or chip and they will take the tip without me having to turn my head. So I am watching the table the entire time and protecting my hand. If you could have done that it would have made the situation better but you would have had to have the $1 out before the waitress came.

One time I was in a 20/40 LHE hand at Foxwoods with a player in the 5 seat (I was in the 9 seat so I could see everything that was happening). He bet and I raised on the turn. A waitress came to deliver him his drink and he turned away from the table to receive it and tip her and probably do a little bit of flirting (the waitresses at Foxwoods were basically all stunningly beautiful at the time though not particularly young). The 5 seat player had most of his chips in 2 racks (one on top of the other) and his cards were in front of the racks with no card protector on it. The Dealer asked the player if he was still in the hand and the player didn't respond because he was still talking to the waitress. So the dealer mucked his hand. When the player turned around and saw he no longer had a hand he got furious because it turned out he had KK (and yes he was ahead). He called a Floor over and the Floor ruled his hand was dead and that I had won. The lesson for me is to never turn away from the table in the middle of a hand even though I do have a card protector. Regardless of the reason. But mostly to deal with waitresses.

In tournaments I always put a $1 bill in my table drink place so when a waitress delivers my drink I can quickly tip them. But there are times when I don't have a $1 bill and its going to take a little time to get the change...

Biggest tell you can make is the size of your bet.

How many drinks do you order over a session. You're probably not noticing the times they came and it wasn't a bad time.

If you haven’t cultivated a friendly enough relationship with one of your neighbors at the table that they will tip her for you while you’re in a hand, you’re doing it wrong.

please stop making threads and explore the site instead. Almost all your questions have been answered before.

Great Point!

There are still some very good posters on 2 + 2

I was also wondering why the dealer was just staying silent, he could easily tell her I was involved in a hand.

I've generally been pre tipping and i also pay for my food in advance. I bring a lot of drinks with me. I like to minimize distractions as much as possible.

One thing kind of funny happen when I pretipped the waitress one night, came back, and she forgot my drink. I said, can I get my tip back? She was not happy about that (it was the end of her shift).

But generally, I'll say I'm going to pretip you; can you just drop it here later. I'll tell the food servers, hey I'm going to tip you know if I'm in a big pot when you come back later, you can just drop the food off here.

That works pretty well. Leaders anticipate. Losers react. That's why I'm here 😀

That's correct. I usually can't resist to order a few Perrier's when I'm playing if they are free 😀

And a food order can sometimes be pretty helpful to avoid waiting in line.

Cheers!

At most places I play, the waitress will just put the drink on s table next to the table without saying anything if the player is obviously involved in a hand. Occasionally his neighbor will tip her, but usually she'll be back soon and the player will tip her then, or he'll leave the tip on the table for her to get the next time she comes by.

At my current room they will drop off the drinks in that manner even though they aren't free. But it's a small room full of nearly all regulars, and this is the biggest game in the room where most of the players are very well off and very good tippers.

Where I sometimes play (Playground Poker Club), it's a big room and waitresses just drop the drinks without waiting if a player is involved in a hand. They'll come back anyway and the players always have another chance to tip them.

Nobody ever taps on our shoulders for tips, I find it strange that she did it twice.

I'd say you need to react i some way when getting a drink.

i agree that handing over a tip is as easy as saying "please wait' and i agree that asking her to wait hurts her income and she possibly may get tipped less not just in quantity but quality too because the guy who was going to tip $5 for fast service now tips $1 because the lazy waitress took her sweet time to bring him a drink

but... the thing that really slows things down is when there is no place to put anything and the waitress needs you to physically take what is being handed to you

i've had waitresses try to put drinks in my hands as i'm literally counting out chips to make or call a bet or as i'm picking up my hole cards (which then require free hands to either fold or call/raise) and that's a bit out of line imo

so i see both sides - but for the most part i agree that op is probably in the wrong based on his description

Can give off tells if you start dealing with the waitress in a big pot (especially if you're playing real poker and you actually do bluff and make plays)

If you're waiting for AA all day, and playing ABC poker it might not be an issue.

In this case let's say that the waitress did set the drinks down on the table already. Hero was clearly in a big pot, and it's very obvious.

In that case, obviously the waitress didn't do her job properly, IMO

Tips are optional right?

If it's a big pot / tough spot, tells can be given off. That means the person doesn't know what to do, they are in a tough spot. Or they need to pretend like they were in a tough spot.

Also when the waitress comes over when yourre in a hand, the dealers usually want you to act first before dealing with the waitress in smaller pots.

I'm pretty sure if she was trained properly she would not be interrupting players when they are playing a big pot.

She's supposed to actually wait.

But given that she already had a place to drop the free drinks, and that the drinks were already dropped, then this was a no brainer IMO. She's willing potentially cost a player thousands of dollars for a 2 dollar tip? I think that the self awareness, awareness of the situation, and caring about the players is lacking at times. They make good money at this place also. Probably about 1K a night for a busy waitress on the Strip?

My advice is to keep your expectations very low. Very very low.

Then you won't be too disappointed when the service sucks.

If I'm in this situation in the future, I'm not going to reply to the waitress. It's perfectly fine given the circumstances to ignore her until the hand was over. If you're live game is tight enough that you can multitask and have side conversations in massive pots when you don't know what to do or you don't want to give off tells, that's great. Everybody is different.

The better caliber servers will wait, and food runners. I've seen it a thousand times.

Every body has off days. So just because a waitress made a mistake, doesn't mean she's not a great employee.

I will assist here as I'm an expert in table etiquette.

You don't have to tip if you're busy but if you're between hands the going rate is a dollar.

Another good thing to do in a cash game in Vegas is to order a beer when you're about to leave the game, that way it only cost you a dollar instead of heading to the bar and paying about 10. Get's you one up on the night ahead.

The waitress tapped you on the shoulder for a tip while you were in a hand? Seriously? I've never had that happen -- never! I've played all over the country for years (including Vegas multiple times a year).

I have had them tap me to give me my drink (no table) or if I needed to pay.

Where was this?

She was a good waitress who made a mistake and apologized later (maybe Aria).

From what I recall now, the waitress told me she didn't notice that was in a pot, which seems pretty unbelievable actually LOL. But I think she's usually doing hi quality work.

The good servers know not to bother you when there's cards in front of you and a bunch of chips in the pot. But it's really not hard to just pass a buck over your shoulder.

There are only one or two good cocktail servers at Aria, so you were lucky to get a "good" one 😉

(Aria seriously some of the worst cocktail service in Vegas -- they take full advantage of being a union. I'd make a fortune working there. Still not sure why they don't take advantage of it.)

This was a huge pot and a very tough spot. Tells could be given off.

I actually bluff and make plays so it's not as easy for me as it might be for others.