Rballgrinder 4k to 40k Bankroll Challenge

9/6/2025
Coin Bankroll:$4100
I had a couple of breakeven sessions thus far.

The Miracle of the Carnivore Diet:

I’ve spent my life doing carpentry and kitchen cabinet refacing. Over the years, this physically demanding work took a toll, leaving me with severe arthritis in my knees and constant inflammation throughout my body. The pain was overwhelming, and as a way to cope, I started drinking beer at night after work. It felt like a temporary escape, but it only deepened the cycle of pain and discomfort. At the time, I didn’t fully realize what I was doing.

For the last two years, I’ve been juggling physical labor with poker. On top of my kitchen refacing jobs, I also had to complete several carpentry projects at my house, which I had to sell after my divorce. It was a tough time, a real struggle.

One day, while browsing YouTube, I stumbled across videos claiming that certain diets could cure conditions like diabetes, arthritis, and more. My first thought was, "This is BS. It sounds too good to be true." But then, I read the comments, and one story stood out. A man who was scheduled for knee replacement surgery in three weeks had started this diet, and ended up canceling his appointment because the pain had dramatically decreased. That caught my attention. I thought, “Hey, maybe this is worth trying.”

The diet was simple: meat, salt, and eggs. At first, I was looking for variations that allowed beer, but everywhere I looked, I saw the same thing—alcohol is poison and doesn’t belong in any healthy diet. Still, I was determined to give it a shot.

I committed to trying the carnivore diet for at least one month. Within four days, most of the pain in my body had disappeared. I had always believed that my joints were beyond repair, that I’d be living in constant pain for the rest of my life. This, for me, was nothing short of a miracle.

Now, over two months later, I’ve lost 15 pounds, I’m lean, strong, and feel better than I have in years. I’m 54 years old, but I feel like I’m 30 again. My future seems limitless. I’m ready to crush life and pursue my poker dreams with newfound energy.

9/9/2025
Coin Bankroll: $3690
Also have 2 $150 MTT tickets

Riding the Waves of Variance: My Current Poker Journey

Variance has been hitting me hard lately. I started playing on CoinPoker about two months ago. I deposited $1,700, ran it up to $5,400 in August, and thought I was ready to mix in $50 MTTs and take my bankroll to the moon. But reality had other plans.

Almost immediately after hitting that peak, I went on a nasty downswing. Within a week, I slid back to $4,000. The swings felt brutal, and that’s when I decided to start a bankroll challenge.

Right now, with two MTT tickets and about $3.7k in the bankroll, I’m technically close to break-even. But it doesn’t feel that way. Tilt has been creeping in, and I keep asking myself: Am I playing bad, or just running bad?

The truth is, I study poker almost every day. I came from the “tight is right” era, but the modern game is so much more aggressive and calculated. These days, you’re expected to play any hand with an edge. It reminds me of Kenny Rogers’ The Gambler: “You gotta know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em.” Only, in 2025, that definition feels completely different than it did back in 2007. Maybe the real wisdom is: “Know when to walk away, know when to run.” And honestly, I’ve asked myself—is today’s game just too tough?

But I’m not ready to walk away. Not yet. If I want to be great at this game, I need to address what I consider my biggest leak: being fully present and focused while I play. The goal is to combine aggression, confidence, and calculation—basically, to play my A-game as often as possible.

The Mental Game Struggle

So how do I stay present at the table? That’s the question I wrestle with every day.

For me, the hardest part is focus. Before sessions, I often deal with anxiety and nerves. Oddly enough, I usually find clarity about three hours in—around the time my second cup of coffee kicks in.

I’ve considered hiring a mental coach. Jason Su’s work looks amazing, but it’s expensive. And honestly, I’m kind of a lone wolf; I want to figure things out myself. Recently, I started listening again to Elliot Roe’s pregame MP3s, which have helped me in the past. I’ve also noticed that having a solid morning routine makes a huge difference in reducing pre-session anxiety. That’s something I’m working on rebuilding.

Emotion, though, still plays too big of a role in my game. The pre-session anxiety lowers my focus, my confidence dips, and even coffee doesn’t fully snap me out of it. I used to play way too tight and miss RFIs and 3-bets, but after tons of study, I’ve fixed that leak. Now my early-session self-talk is all about making sure I don’t miss those spots—but that hyperfocus sometimes blinds me to the bigger picture.

Ironically, when I run bad, I sometimes get pissed and start playing more aggressively. In other words, my emotions are still steering the ship too often. Instead of consistently playing with calm, calculated aggression, I let frustration dictate my style.

Learning From Painful Hands

I recently played a hand that I almost brushed off as just a bad beat. But something felt off, so I sent it to my coach. Part of me felt like a whiny kid for even doing that—like I should just “man up.” But in truth, I wasn’t present during that river decision. I let my emotions take over instead of thinking logically.

Most players would’ve just called, chalked it up as a cooler, and moved on. But I don’t want to be like most players. I want to be in the top 10%—not just strategically, but mentally. I’m not there yet. But I will be.

I will post the hand I am referencing below along with my thought process.

Hand #292010769: Tournament #1365564, ₮25 Turbo PKO (70% Bounty) ₮5.5+₮17.5+₮2 Hold'em No Limit (150/300 ante 45 play) 2025/09/04 16:14:20 GMT
Table '2' 7-max Seat #5 is the button
Seat 1: rballer (9709 in chips, 1750 bounty)
Seat 2: ShennyBar (6609 in chips, 1750 bounty)
Seat 3: immerwin721 (15273 in chips, 2625 bounty)
Seat 5: Gecko2k3 (27152 in chips, 3500 bounty)
Seat 7: buccaramanga (28440 in chips, 4375 bounty)
rballer: posts the ante 45
ShennyBar: posts the ante 45
immerwin721: posts the ante 45
Gecko2k3: posts the ante 45
buccaramanga: posts the ante 45
buccaramanga: posts small blind 150
rballer: posts big blind 300
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to rballer [Jh 8h]
Dealt to rballer [Jh 8h]
ShennyBar: folds
immerwin721: raises 300 to 600
Gecko2k3: folds
buccaramanga: folds
rballer: calls 300
*** FLOP *** [Jc 6d 5c]
rballer: checks
immerwin721: bets 787
rballer: calls 787
*** TURN *** [Jc 6d 5c] [5h]
rballer: bets 944
immerwin721: calls 944
*** RIVER *** [Jc 6d 5c 5h] [5d]
rballer: bets 2770
immerwin721: raises 12897 and is all-in
rballer: calls 4563 and is all-in
Uncalled bet (5564) returned to immerwin721
*** SHOW DOWN ***
immerwin721: shows [Ac Ah] (a full house, Fives over Aces)
rballer: shows [Jh 8h] (a full house, Fives over Jacks)
immerwin721 collected 19703 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 19703 | Rake 0
Board [ Jc 6d 5c 5h 5d ]
Game ended: 2025/09/04 16:15:26 GMT
Seat 1: rballer (big blind) showed [Jh 8h]
Seat 2: ShennyBar folded before Flop
Seat 3: immerwin721 showed [Ac Ah] and won (19703) with a full house, Fives over Aces
Seat 5: Gecko2k3 (button) folded before Flop
Seat 7: buccaramanga (small blind) folded before Flop

Preflop- Standard Defend
32bb Effective( J8s)BB vs CO RFI
Villian was relatively unknown, with some fishy stats, but a small sample size

OTF- There were some thoughts of check raising, but with our kicker and the 1/2 pot size, I felt just calling the cbet way better

OTT - I wasn't sure if leading small was good or not with the third card pairing. I did elect to lead. Solver agreed and was leading this card a lot, but why? In my mind, the answer is that we control the size of the pot, get value from worse hands, and protect ourselves by getting hands with equity against us to fold. In this spot my play makes sense, but in the game, I may have been thinking that I know what the solver does here and lets emulate that, and I wasnt clear on the why.

OTR- I am not sure about my sizing on this river. Solver doesn't use this size. Solver mostly uses 10% or 83%, but the EV is the same for 1/2 pot. On one hand, it does seem crazy to fold here in this spot given the price we are getting, but are humans ever finding bluffs here? We have all the 5x here, and is there any point in the villain jamming the same hand we have? Also am I even going 1/2 pot with my hand?

In my emotional state, I was just thinking yes, he will have the rare 5x and AA-QQ, and with the price we just have to pay

CAN WE FIND A FOLD HERE?

Wp Pre/Flop/Turn... Don't donk river, just putting yourself into bad spot vs range that has AA-JJ (19 combos).
I would cut out donking out of your game (maybe super rare occasions) it's not hard to play against and only complicate your strategy for no EV gain.

Thanks DeeKaybee,
I will definitely keep what you said about donking overall.

Coin Bankroll: $3008 Plus $350 in MTT tickets
BOL Bankroll: $2045

5 AM Reflections

It’s 5 a.m. — an hour earlier than I usually wake up. This downswing has been weighing heavily on me. For almost three weeks now, I’ve been on the losing side, down about $3.5k. Right now, poker feels almost impossible.

I just got back from vacation, hoping the break would reset things — that the run-bad and tilt would fade. But after my first session back, it’s clear that it hasn’t happened yet. What makes it harder is that when the cards go against me, my play slips too, and I end up losing more than I should.

So this morning, instead of dwelling on it, I’m going to study. Maybe today is the day the tide finally turns, and I can start building back again.

Good luck hope things go better today!! Do you play live/have any viable live poker options?

What's your ABI? Games played per session/week/month? What are you specifically doing to study? If you don't have a job, a wife, or a house why are you staying in a jurisdiction that is limiting your prospective professional abilities?

Invest the money cause u have no chance in hell.....

Apreciate all the advice all
This is not my first Rodeo

https://gyazo.com/a7b70bae95ac5919ff5b34...

ABI & Volume
Right now, my ABI is around $20. I’m putting in about 20 MTTs a day, 5–6 days a week, while keeping my table count capped at six. In the past, I played more tables, but I realized that grinding higher volume doesn’t help me improve the way I want. My focus is on getting better, building the skills to beat tougher games, and eventually raising my ABI.

Study Routine
I’ve been taking study more seriously. I use BBZ and GTO Wizard, and I also work with a coach (a Brazilian friend of mine). Over the past couple of months, I really honed in on preflop—turns out I was playing way too nitty. My routine now looks like this: I review marked hands after sessions, use GTO Wiz before sessions (trainer, range builder, node locking, etc.), and send hands to my coach. We meet twice a week for coaching sessions. Now that my foundation is stronger, we’re starting to dive deeper into exploits.

Employment
At the moment, I’m not working outside of poker. Up until recently, I was helping a friend with kitchen remodels, averaging about two weeks of work each month.

Marital Status
On the personal side, I’m very happily married to my second wife. She has a great career, and while moving isn’t an option right now, I feel fortunate to have her support.

These are the cards I am dealt, and I choose to play them. Welcome to my blog. This is the beginning of something great.

BOOM

Coin Bankroll: $2,929 Plus $350 in MTT tickets
Betonline: $3,219

Although I had a breakeven session on Coin, I shipped the $20 5k gt on Betonline.
+1.1K Session
LFG

I peeped out your graph, looks like you've been putting in 3-4k games/yr for awhile with a fairly consistent ROI in the high teens and ABI around $13-14 which yeah, if you throw some targeted/specific study into the mix and have more time you can dedicate to grinding could realistically get you to the place you're trying to go. Best of luck.