Moderation Questions
The last iteration of the moderation discussion thread was a complete disaster. Numerous attempts to keep it on topic fa
I mean I agree, I was adopting coordi’s phraseology.
I prefer the term “finding a sexual partner” which could encompass getting into a relationship or a one night stand or anything in between.
"getting laid" is actual locker room talk, not rapey **** or praising hitler
most one night stands are unilateral episodes of self gratification
Many relationships start as unilateral episodes of self gratification that grow into more
Like, step one to getting laid is actually to be polarizing. You want to eliminate people who wont be attracted to you as fast as possible
couldn't agree more
i think this is optimal - but when put into practice - ie not being amenable but standing your ground, disclosing your flaws, talking about your dealbreakers etc can really rile people up and our strategy is considered a very hot take
i've often been quoted this by friends who are shocked to learn about my polarizing "sort em out fast" strategy
"getting laid" is actual locker room talk, not rapey **** or praising hitler
most one night stands are unilateral episodes of self gratification
Many relationships start as unilateral episodes of self gratification that grow into more
It’s something to be thought about more deeply rather than immediately defending it imo. You straddle the line sometimes.
couldn't agree more
i think this is optimal - but when put into practice - ie not being amenable but standing your ground, disclosing your flaws, talking about your dealbreakers etc can really rile people up and our strategy is considered a very hot take
i've often been quoted this by friends who are shocked to learn about my polarizing "sort em out fast" strategy
Damn, you really missed an opportunity here:
It’s something to be thought about more deeply rather than immediately defending it imo. You straddle the line sometimes.
I’m a bit of a misogynist and I understand why that’s bad and why things should be more egalitarian but do try to use how misogyny has benefited me to frame how there has been inequality and how things can be more egalitarian
So yeah, I don’t disagree with what you’re saying
I think it would be very unhelpful for me to try to explain the point I was making in regards to expression is that many of the men most likely to turn to “incel” like ideas are men who, due to patriarchal norms and expectations, these are men who did not learn to express themselves well and are now supporting the very kind of controlling patriarchal ideas and figures that held them back in the first place that they now blame on women , leftists, lgbtq people etc.
The exact answer for these kinds of men is to stop listening to right wing sources and literally just talk to women in an expressive way about their likes and dislikes. They should be talking to more ladies.
Even the language you use is off-putting, like saying you’re gonna “get laid”. Men continue to frame sex as this transactional process of acquiring something from a passive participant, like it’s a goal to achieve rather than an experience to share.
Good thing women never do that.
It’s something to be thought about more deeply rather than immediately defending it imo. You straddle the line sometimes.
I mean, "Men are coarse regarding sex and they need to focus more on shared emotional needs" is certainly valid, but we could also flip this and say "Women are just too uptight about casual, transactional sex." At some point we're just sort of mad that the opposing sexes don't prioritize emotional/physical needs in the same way.
I feel like me tying expression to fashion was very unhelpful for the crowd here even though I did not intend it that way. I feel like Im always trying to help people and no one understands what I mean. This point is a lot more true in places like western kansas and parts of the south where behaivoral norms enforced on men, including how they choose to dress, are much more specific than in a place like nyc or portland where no one bats an eye if someone wears a dog collar or something outlandish. “try that in a small town” magas like to say. still it remains true that is one way to express yourself that “incels” might have been discouraged from in a negative way.
I feel like me tying expression to fashion was very unhelpful for the crowd here even though I did not intend it that way. I feel like Im always trying to help people and no one understands what I mean. This point is a lot more true in places like western kansas and parts of the south where behaivoral norms enforced on men, including how they choose to dress, are much more spec
If you are on twitter https://x.com/dieworkwear might be a good follow for you
The men of 2+2 gathering to discuss women never fails to deliver. Truly. You don't have to act like you have smooth doll parts down there. You also don't have to act like you only recently discovered bipedalism. Just pretend for a moment that the person you want to have sex with is a member of the same species as you. See how that goes.
The men of 2+2 gathering to discuss women never fails to deliver. Truly. You don't have to act like you have smooth doll parts down there. You also don't have to act like you only recently discovered bipedalism. Just pretend for a moment that the person you want to have sex with is a member of the same species as you. See how that goes.
classic example of a performative male - ignoring the woman here is screeching from the tower that all men are unfuggable and showering down condemnation on all the men responding with nuanced discussion
Straight men have shifted towards inceldom and not wanting to offend dominate(abusive) males so they are afraid to express themselves with fashion. straight men are increasingly afraid. I want to help them but of course the advice they need is the opposite of what they want to hear.
I used to work at a place where everyone dressed well. It was just the overall vibe and expectation of the place. I enjoyed it tbh. For a lot of people, dressing well improves your self-confidence.
If you are on twitter https://x.com/dieworkwear might be a good follow for you
coordi, I already know that guy. I will say that part of the reason I am casually taking graphic design classes now instead of fashion design is because I myself was never taught skills that wouldve been useful for someone like me at a young age. I’m saying that although I am not someone who grew up knitting , sewing dresses etc and was unfortunately discouraged from things like that I still have an interestin those things and follow some people who know a lot. Someone in my family , who, unlike me actually is an expert on fashion went to the new york fashion institute, worked at chanel successfully and now has a high paying job for Tory Burch. I think a lot more guys are socialized in a way that is wrong for them than people realize. Not being out until my twenties I was absurdly unknowledgeable about many things society never taught me and I think this extends to straight guys as well.
I used to work at a place where everyone dressed well. It was just the overall vibe and expectation of the place. I enjoyed it tbh. For a lot of people, dressing well improves your self-confidence.
Hi rococo! You may inadvertently be confusing some guys, not knowing the genesis of this conversation where I was making a narrrow point about expression. but whatever i think given the crowd of people here everyones doing about as good as they could be.
classic example of a performative male - ignoring the woman here is screeching from the tower that all men are unfuggable and showering down condemnation on all the men responding with nuanced discussion
For whom am I performing? I've never met any of you. I doubt I ever will. My comments were directed at the men because 95% of the posts have been from men. I often disagree with CN's broad brush characterizations. But based on the way that men in this forum talk (and apparently think) about sex, I understand why we she thinks a lot of you guys are creeps.
Hi rococo! You may inadvertently be confusing some guys, not knowing the genesis of this conversation where I was making a narrrow point about expression. but whatever i think given the crowd of people here everyones doing about as good as they could be.
I don't entirely follow what you are saying in the post above, but I'm glad to see you around bryce. I hope you are doing well.
For whom am I performing? I've never met any of you. I doubt I ever will. My comments were directed at the men because 95% of the posts have been from men. I often disagree with CN's broad brush characterizations. But based on the way that men in this forum talk (and apparently think) about sex, I understand why we she thinks a lot of you guys are creeps.
Can you give an example of that?
Sure.
Lots of men are damaged but not nearly at the same rate. I don't know any women who don't have severe emotional issues. It's non stop drama with them. They complain about their co workers. They complain about their ex boyfriends. They complain about their female friends. As I listen to them I can't help but notice how much of this was their doing. They simply don't take respons
you're just projecting your real life habits onto us via muscle memory
like last year when you claimed not to know a single man who would ever comment on a woman's appearance just to signal how above it all you were only to then later admit that wasn't true when i pressed you on the absurdity of that bald faced lie
you're far from the worst offender though
i genuinely like you though and think you're a great poster - but a penchant for senseless virtue signaling is definitely your kryptonite
Lots of men are damaged but not nearly at the same rate. I don't know any women who don't have severe emotional issues. It's non stop drama with them. They complain about their co workers. They complain about their ex boyfriends. They complain about their female friends. As I listen to them I can't help but notice how much of this was their doing. They simply don't take respons
Meat ups tho.
