Nima Jooyandeh is a scammer and a thief
mod note: This post is a cliffnotes of the actions of Nima Jooyandeh on these and other forums.
Nima Jooyandeh, who also goes by "the bay area beast" (and dozens of other names over a 10+ year history posting on the internet on various sites) stole $14,500 from poster Fubster. He has repaid $10,000 of it so far.
Some of the circumstances of the theft include taking sports bets from him acting as both a middleman for another bookie, and acting directly as a bookie himself. Stealing winnings paid out by other bookie, and scamming Fubster by not paying out the winnings from bets he booked himself after previously collecting money from losing bets that he had booked for Fubster. He also attempted to vehemently deny being the actual bet taker, and instead used a fake name of an alleged associate, who it was discovered was a fake persona used to steal (by having this fake bookie "disappear" during California wild fires).
In addition to that, here are other activities this person has participated in that have been admitted to by him on this forum, or have links posted to him being caught on other forums
1. Tried to start a book with poster HIV. Owes poster HIV ~$5K and is paying him back at a rate of $5/week.
2. Ran bets/money for Fubs.
3. Ran his own book and took bets/money as fake identity Sterling.
4. Stiffed Fub for $6k+ as Sterling.
5. Stiffed iceminers on SBR $500. Created fake identity to defend himself etc.
6. Stiffed a guy for $800 or $1000 on Rxforum.
7. Has had many accounts banned on Pickmonitor.
He spent many years pretending to be a sports tout and often started subscription services to sports picks. These subscriptions always flamed out as soon as he hit a losing streak. He would often claim things like "100% guaranteed winning picks", and "complete transparency".
i actually think nima would be a very gregarious person in real life and would know better than the openly say he fantasizes about raping random women he sees
If you dump the unfiltered contents of any mans brain into a thread, you're gonna come up with things you can use to make him sound that bad - or worse.
Most men are smart enough not to admit things like that and most of the rest aren't the biggest troll in the history of a poker forum. So this doesn't happen to them.
i hope someday i am as good at something, as nima is at rustling your guys' jimmies. it's truly something you guys are still this mad over some words he wrote to you on a message board 10+ years ago.
lol
you just conflated this thread with real life. which was exactly the error i said you were making.
this is one corner of the internet. it's not even all of the internet. and it sure as **** isn't real life.
i understand you guys have a huge list of things you think represent him in real life. they don't. they're just some distorted bits of information which you view through the lens of him being a dick to you. that's the salient fact here. he was a dick. none of this other stuff would have been
we are simply going by the anecdotal evidence provided by none other than Nima himself. you're making the mistake of not reading the thread. your whole understanding of why he's being trolled ITT is warped. he deserves it and, in fact, deserves much worse.
i hope someday i am as good at something, as nima is at rustling your guys' jimmies. it's truly something you guys are still this mad over some words he wrote to you on a message board 10+ years ago.
nobody, literally nobody, is mad at words Nima wrote to them. if that were the case, do you really think we'd troll him into doing it repeatedly for years? it's very entertaining when he goes off the handle and spews death threats and acts like the person he truly is... an ******* for the ages.
you don't seem cognizant at all of the meta established in this thread. perhaps you should read the it, stop being so naive and partial, then return with a better understanding why he's being treated with no respect.
HIV, i highly sugggest you dig through the posts of nima's many old and banned accounts - a good shortcut would be to just skip to the threads he started
the overwhelming trend is nima thinks he's smarter than everyone despite that he's objectively speaking, below average intelligence
he will often post about having figured out a loophole or a system and how he's going to exploit it for riches
people initially deal with him in good faith and try to carefully explain the issues with his scheme, mentioning that he either did the math wrong or that his "discovery" is well known and already priced into the equation and thus him knowing about it doesn't give him an edge
he typically responds to this stuff not by thanking the people but by insulting them and ridiculing them, calling them haters who aren't at his level of genius - and then weeks later after he's lost everything on his scheme he never mentions that failure again nor learns from it and moves onto the next
he genuinely considers himself an advantage blackjack bettor despite that he's lost money at it and the local casino welcomes him with open arms
just check out the football card thread that's linked here and once again you can see the same patterns repeat - he believes he found priceless jerry rice rookie cards and pays a lot for them, posts them online asking about how to get those graded as 10s and everyone says nice cards, but you'll be lucky to get them rated as 8s because there's a bunch of visible flaws
he doesn't say "oh thanks am new to this and my untrained eye couldn't see those flaws" but instead yells at those people, calls them stupid and then only when eveyrone is unanimously saying there's no way any of those cards are 10s or even 9s he then changes gears to the injustic of it all and how there are "worse cards out there graded as 10s" and how the system is corrupt and it's so unfair and yadda yadda yadda
he's literally the worst and that's why everyone trolls him - because it's impossible to have a normal interaction with him because he's not only stupid, but he's obstinately stupid to the point where it's not just that he doesn't get it himself, but he believes he his secret genius has this massive edge that only he can see and everyone else is an idiot
like his entire baseball thing was "pick teams with good pitchers" which is incredibly stupid because the teams with the better pitchers are priced accordingly - that's not some secret system he discovered and that's why baseball games where it's a good pitcher facing a bad one aren't -110/-110 but instead -190/+150 where you need to win at a tremendous and unsustainable rate just by picking better pitchers, if you're betting -190 moneylines, you need to win at least 2/3 of the time just to break even. and then when his "matt cain is a good pitcher why'd i lose money" questions arise, he doesn't learn from the experience but rather will find absurd reasons
like one of the memes here is "strawberry moon" because he once explained why he lost so much money in baseball was because of these crazy "astrology events" like "there was a strawberry moon in June, that's why I lost that month" but he's so stupid that he doesn't even realize that names for moon phases are based on the month of the year, not he type of moon, every moon in june is called a strawberry moon because that's the generic word for the moon in june - he's that stupid
he said the equivalent of "i can't believe i lost so much in the nba this winter and then i finally figured out it was because of all these crazy things going on, like last year christmas happened in december, which is wild and must have been a big reason why i lost money because that is a rare event that never happens"
The abject stupidity required to conclude that people hate Babs because his posts are mean to other posters…
If you dump the unfiltered contents of any mans brain into a thread, you're gonna come up with things you can use to make him sound that bad - or worse.
Most men are smart enough not to admit things like that and most of the rest aren't the biggest troll in the history of a poker forum. So this doesn't happen to them.
Or and i know this might surprise you a lot of people dont act like that because they dont want to act like that. **** people always seem to say hey if you had the opportunity to be a **** person you would also be a **** person.
Not realising that others may be kind and considerate not because they are afraid of the consequences if they aren't but because that is simply who they are.
My behaviour in person is just as it is on the internet because this whole internet real life divide that people seem to perceive is total bullshit.
Character is what you are in the dark.
How did I miss this gem from 2020:
About 15 years ago, a buddy of mine showed me Pai Gow poker, and I also worked as a third party proposition player for one of those gaming corporations you see in the card rooms. I developed a liking for pai poker and that and blackjack were my games of choice. It used to be a decent game, and seemed pretty fair. Win some, lose some. I would bank often and sometimes it would work sometimes it wouldnt. Nothing really alarming.
Now, fast forward to recent years. Not only has regular pai gow seemingly gotten worse (the dealer getting better hands far too often) but Im sure you're aware that recently there has been a new variation called Face up Pai Gow. It is so utterly shameless that it is truly laughable. The dealer gets two pairs, or an ace high (which is a push) so astonishingly reegularly that it cant possibly be random. They will run off 20 Ace highs without ever getting a King or Queen High. I know Im not this unlucky. When they are not getting an Ace high or Pair-Pair they are getting A straight with an Ace, or a flush with a pair, Full house, etc. Maybe one out of every 10 times do they get a bad hand. EVERY TIME. I am not exaggerating and I am absolutely certain that this cant possibly be a coincidence. If you didnt know, when the dealer gets an Ace high that means every hand automatically pushes.
Believe me, I understand how this could possibly come across to a stranger online, Hell, if I read this I might laugh too. However I guarantee you would think the same if you had witnessed what I have. I have a buddy who is a big time gambler with years of experience and literally millions of dollars wagered, and he wholeheartedly agrees. True story.
I was wondering what others who have played this game thought. And no I am just an insanely unlucky person. I have had dozens of winning sessions at blackjacks and also pai gow, (regular pai gow, not the face up version).
Reminds me of the Phil Hellmuth slot machine line.
nah his best one was his thread about timing when to login to the online poker sites in order to exploit the rng
his keno one where people tried forever to explain that his math was wrong and he called them stupid haters and then everyone just wants him to lose at that point and then encourage him to go hammer the casino was also pretty good
There's a thread somewhere in the annals of this site's history, where Hellmuth was getting killed in a cash game and he told the guy who was beating him "You pay out just like a slot machine."
And the guy said "Exactly," since as we all know, slot machines are -EV for the player.
You've got to sit at 3rd base, you idiot...
he will often post about having figured out a loophole or a system and how he's going to exploit it for riches
people initially deal with him in good faith and try to carefully explain the issues with his scheme
That's also him in real life. But this isn't my first time on the internet. People don't politely and gently and delicately explain to him the flaws in his plan. Many/some of then are rude and confrontational - as people on the internet are. And he reacts to that and then off you go.
In real life people are actually nice about it and so there is no blowup. He reacts to what you give him. Be nice to him and he's going to be nice to you. Most people in real life are nice by default and so he generally gets along fine with people. More than that - people usually really like him.
You would not be doing this if he were nice to you and you liked him. I've already explained this point in depth earlier ITT. I'm not arguing about it again. I am 100% right about this - you guys refuse to admit this all sits on a foundation of you not liking him. Remove that foundation and the rest goes away.
Countless wrong has been done throughout history. Countless atrocities.
The poker world is also filled with horrible people who have done horrible things and more happen everyday.
But who gets this thread? The Bay Area Beast.
Why? According to you guys, it's because he's done so many bad things.
In reality: it's because he put your jimmies in a blender and refuses to turn that blender off, he's blending your jimmies right now. World Champion Jimmie Rustler 11 years running. And on top of that, he did bad stuff.
hi nima
Imagine a cop pulls you over because you were driving 62 in a 55. And as soon as he gets to the window you start screaming about how you hate cops and what an awful person he is and you hope he gets shot. You just keep cussing at him and insulting him, his wife and his children. You even insult his dog.
And at the end, you get a ticket for 5 different minor infractions, he pepper sprays you and smashes your phone.
And his explanation for all of that is 'he was speeding'
That's you guys. Insisting it was about the speeding. And not about how he treated you.
Countless wrong has been done throughout history. Countless atrocities.
The poker world is also filled with horrible people who have done horrible things and more happen everyday.
But who gets this thread? The Bay Area Beast.
this is what gave it away nima, really surprised you could keep your alt account hidden for so long, this is 100% nima thought here about countless wrongs and injustices - much like how you closed off your courtroom speech with "sir, there's so much wrong with humanity"
and i think we all now know for a fact what the 88 really stands for now
You would not be doing this if he were nice to you and you liked him. I've already explained this point in depth earlier ITT. I'm not arguing about it again. I am 100% right about this - you guys refuse to admit this all sits on a foundation of you not liking him. Remove that foundation and the rest goes away.
Somebody says "nobody is mad at him for the things he said to us."
Your response is "YOU WON'T ADMIT THAT YOU JUST DON'T LIKE HIM."
You're doing great, man.
He took what I said and twisted it around a bit, so I brought it back to what I said and meant. I've done the same with you here.
It's not just that you don't like him, it's that all of this happened and is still happening, because you don't like him.
What I'm describing is a very normal, human thing. If you make people dislike you, they are going to be mean to you.
The shocking part is people trying to deny that's happening here. Pretending you guys are just objective, rational internet citizens shedding light on bad actors. It has nothing to do with how deeply you despise him personally. That's a complete coincidence.
That's also him in real life. But this isn't my first time on the internet. People don't politely and gently and delicately explain to him the flaws in his plan.
False.
Many, many times in the original thread, people took their time trying to coach and help you. They tried to explain how EV and sports betting work. They tried to talk you into going into a real business instead of dumping everything into sports betting. They tried to encourage you to stop drinking, stop drugs, clean up your act, and get a job skip tracing.
False.
Many, many times in the original thread, people took their time trying to coach and help you. They tried to explain how EV and sports betting work. They tried to talk you into going into a real business instead of dumping everything into sports betting. They tried to encourage you to stop drinking, stop drugs, clean up your act, and get a job skip tracing.
100% of people?
I don't doubt that some people were polite and helpful. But I also have no doubt that some people were rude to him. He would never have started acting this way if he wasn't attacked first. I know this because me and him are the same in this way. Places on the internet people are nice to me, I have no problems with anyone ever. Places people start talking condescending to me and attacking me, it's going to go down very different. A beast gives you what you give him.
That's a weak cop out. If 100% of people don't treat you perfectly, you're going to engage in the worst behavior? This is why the sites about you aren't coming down, ever, Nima. And why you're having to change your name away from your own family's name, because you have brought so much shame to it. You refuse to man up to what you've done, admit your past failings, and work to change.
