2024 NFL Regular Season: Vikings vs. Lions SNF Showdown!
You know, since the Super Bowl periodically i will watch the CBS Sinatra intro cuz it was ****ing magnificent. Halfway through i will remember how that game went and I will be dead inside. I hate myself enough that I will keep ripping off the scab. A niners fan in their 30s probably knows more heartbreak than any fan living, and I say that knowing that stupid ass team in upstate New York lost 4 straight Super Bowls. I come into this season knowing an inevitability that the 9ers will be good. Very good. And like that they've done for a ****ing decade they will find a brand new way to rip my ****ing heart out inches away from a Super Bowl. I am about to waste 5 ****ing months of my life bracing myself for the inevitable. With that in mind i come into this season with a new outlook:
**** you all. Every last one of you. Indiscrimenantly and unconditionally. All of you ****ers deserve pain and I wish nothing less than that for you. I jerked off when Rodgers tore his achilles 4 snaps into the season cuz I hate him. I am prepared to replicate that for the rest of you. I will bring you down to my level and laugh at your misery until nothing is left but ash.
With that in mind, welcome to the 2024 NFL season.
(Sorting by Super Bowl Odds)
Kansas City Chiefs, +600
Travis Kelce is a braindead mongoloid in a relationship of circumstance with a singer who looks like an abstract painting drawn by a drunk. Your quarterback has a voice that makes me think he sits in the corner and jerks off while his attention whore whore of a wife gets gangbanged to post on IG. His family is full of a sexual predator and a drunk ass father. You are coached by a man who is as objectively terrible at fatherhood as he is at portion control. YOU WANT THEM NUGGIES?! probably not as much as your kids wanted a present dad. Too bad one killed himself and the other killed someone else. But hey, he's got a mustache and he looks like the kool-aid man. WHAT A GUY! Your fans suck. Your forum should be under constant terror surveillance. You still do some racist ass chant because now that Snyder left someone has to wear the mantle of "**** you native americans this is our tradition now." **** you then. **** you now. **** you forever.
San Francisco 49ers, +600
GOD. ****ING. DAMNIT. **** this team that has taken so much of my soul I am certain if an afterlife exists neither side will claim me. Kyle Shanahan? If you choked on dick as much as you choke when it matters you'd either be dead of asphyxiation or your body would be 97% the cum of other men. I am a liberal of Middle Eastern descent rooting for a team whose marquee defensive player gets rock hard at the sight of Trump and whose 7th round QB is a member of Focus on the Family. The levels of moral compromise it takes for me to root for them is only offset by the fact that CTE exists and it all levels out in the end. Watch these ****ers go 14-3 and lose in the Super Bowl because, I dunno, they decide to do some nonsense like take a knee in the end zone to start OT
Baltimore Ravens, +1000
You ****ing worthless bastards. You had one one ****ing job and that was to get your fraud ass MVP RB1 WR1 to the Super Bowl to get your anus protruded. Congrats on giving the keys to your future to a guy so stupid his mom is his agent. The best player in your history was a murderer. The best RB in your history I'm pretty sure is also a murderer. The best QB in your history is basically a runningback who can occassionally throw a football which means he's basically black Julian Edelman with the ability to do an inside handoff. It warms my heart you will never win anything, not because the Chefs are in your conference but because Lamar ain't ****ing ****. You might be feeling a certain kind of way reading me say this but I also watched this guy implode at home in the AFCCG so the burden of proof is on you to tell me this guy ****ing matters. **** you
Detroit Lions, +1200
Bahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahaa what can i actually say to you that God already hasn't. When you are a fan of Detroit sports you have already made a decision your life has no meaning or value. As a Niners fan it warms my heart that we own your ****ing asses. You idiots are so terrible at all things sports you let a guy catch a 50 yard pass off your ****ing helmet. Remember when the Giants swept the best Tigers team you'll ever have? I sure as **** remember. It's cute you think you matter cuz you have some retread QB with no talent other than the worst Super Bowl performance of the modern era and because you decided to give AMSR all the money. Have fun with the consequences of winning the first playoff games in the last half century. I see zero downside here.
Philadelphia Eagles, +1300
The most meaningless 10-1 start in history. No existence has ever shown itself to be more fraudulent than the hype behind "I SQUAT ALL THE POUNDS" and Nick Siriosis. Your QB is **** elevated by a gimmick. Your coach is **** elevated by coordinators who once upon a time were able to hide it. Your city deserves to be nuked from orbit. Nothing on earth means less to societal benefit than a Philly sports fan. You clowns combine the entitlement of St. Louis Cardinals Fans with the stupidity of St. Louis Cardinals Fans with the "my life has no meaning other than the team I root for" of Buffalo Bills fans. You suck so much I once bought a 2+2er a secret santa gift of 7 6ers tickets 1 in each section costing me a total of 20 bucks. That 2+2er lived in Atlanta.
Houston Texans, +1500
I don't give a **** about you
Cincinnati Bengals, +1500
The only good thing to come out of Ohio is the cry from help that comes from anyone who lives there. Skyline Chili? Have some ****ing self-respect you indulgent fat bastards. Stop trying to make Joe Burrow a thing. The only thing that separates that bleached hair ****boi from Boomer Esiason is a cigar. Also the best QB you ever had before this literally chose to name himself BOOMER. No part of me can take you seriously no matter how much you all dEmAnD tO bE tAkEn SeRiOuSlY. You go to a stadium that looks so decrepit I can't rule out it was built in 2700 BC by the Pharoah's slaves to give the cheapest man alive your hard earned money to maybe watch 1 playoff game before you go to the bar and pass up your chance at pussy by telling whatever slag you found on a Craigslist personals ad your hour long retrospective on how Akili Smith just had bad luck
Buffalo Bills +1500
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
You people are something else. Leave it to the team Bon Jovi and Trump couldn't trick people into letting them buy to gloss themselves a mafia because they jump through tables and show up to 0 degree weather games topless and blackout drunk on PBR. 4 Super Bowl Losses Were Not Enough. I fully expect Dom and that other half_nit to scream about how they're going to kill me for this post before they fall asleep in a puddle of their own piss and vomit surrounded by bottles of miller high life and wake up confused about why Josh Allen threw 7 picks in a game they missed. Spare me. I don't care. You guys will suck forever
Dallas Cowboys, +1800
Remember the time Zeke was your lone lineman in the last play of a playoff game? Remember that the coach who drew that up is still your coach? I can't prove it but your owner is a pedo. Jerry will outlive all of you which means that you will never ever ever see a Super Bowl appearance much less a win. ****, you're a dog to even make an NFCCG. But you know what? you deserve it. Every last element of the Dallas Cowboys, their fans, the city of Dallas, the state of Texas is a constant reminder to any decent human being that life can be much, much worse. Imagine being the sole thing on this ****ing earth Stephen A Smith can dunk on.
New York Jets, +1800
On my ****ing life I hope the season opener includes the paralysis of RFK Jr's VP and Podcast Punter's meal ticket. I will happily accept the niners never winning another ****ing game if they end his career opening night. The NFL has included rapists and murderers and somehow I hate the most overrated QB in the history of the game more than any of them. Aaron Hernandez literally got sentenced to life in prison and hung himself and I think Rodgers deserves the chair more. Rae Carruth had someone kill his baby mama and I think Rodgers has a greater claim to being buried under Guantanamo.
J
E
T
S
YOU
SUCK
DICK
Your levels of desperation of disrepair has brought you to this point. Your team is such a ****ing joke Bardy made a 9/11 joke about you that brought the house down.
Green Bay Packers, +1800
Imagine having Favre and Rodgers for 2 decades and ending up with as little as you did. Imagine having the 2 best QBs in your existence be the guy in that movie where that woman put cum in her hair as gel and ended up scamming the state of Mississippi who sends random dick pics to reporters and a guy who is someone more hatable than THAT. It's fitting that the public owns the Packers because you all deserve to wear this. You stupid cheesehead wearing halfwits. I've been to Wisconsin once. The only thing redeemable about that shithole is that I could leave it. And even that seemed dicey.
To the rest of the teams i have not named in this post it is because i do not care enough about you to write paragraphs about you. The panthers have a midget as a QB, the browns have a sexual predator. The boncos have a pill popping piece of **** as their coach, the stealers are lol, pray at the feet of a rapist and have concussion water as their QB1. The Chargers have a coach who sleeps over at the homes of kickers who are not of legal age to make sure they don't go to anyone else but daddy. The Jaguars have the HPoolV stadium and are owned by a guy in a cartoonish mustache with a son who is not Triple H
I wish you all pain. I will not suffer alone.
Let us football
Mod Edit:
List of Other Team Votes with Selection:
newguyhere: Dolphins
marknfw: Cowboys
Saleh on the field at GB practice today
Red rocket with a thumb injury. Sorry heels getting the start. The irony is that rocket's thumb injury is from a car accident yesterday.
Let's see if sorry heels has learned anything.
Should've been starting at least since last week. You got your win with Dalton and he has been pretty awful since.
Dalton hasn't played well the last few games. Bryce is still way worse.
It doesn't matter. Either Bryce Young is so bad and continues to improve your draft position or maybe he develops into something. There's no trade value for him, so letting him sit on the bench is absolutely useless.
Playing Dalton makes zero sense at this point. You got two good games out of him and he is getting worse every week since.
It does matter.
Playing Bryce makes it impossible to evaluate the rest of the offense. Dalton is at least serviceable. The defense is going to make sure we lose either way. We don't need to be worried about draft position being affected by playing Dalton instead.
We also have a first year head coach trying to find his way.
There is a lot more to the organization and team than throwing Bryce to the wolves hoping he might improve from historically bad to just terrible.
ETA: Last week Bryce had an opportunity to play with 5 mins remaining in the game. He played one series, and we went 3 and out. On 3rd and 5, he checks down to Sanders for what ends up being a 6 yard loss. He wasn't even under that much pressure. In a game we were losing 40-7, he didn't even think about trying to throw it past the sticks. It's over.
just in case anybody needs a visual reminder of who we're talking about here
yes
an NFL team took this player w the first overall pick in the draft
Dalton has done nothing either to evaluate your offense. Diontae is really good? Yeah we knew that. Legette? You just drafted and hasn't been much with either QB. Everybody else? Who ****ing cares? This team is almost completely expendable. They got rid of most of their players worth a damn like DJ and BB.
So who are we trying to actually evaluate here? The line is the only really important part except for a rookie or two, and it doesn't matter who plays QB to evaluate that.
You don't think QB play affects how the line looks and performs? We'll have an offseason decision on Ikem's 5th year option. We have a rookie 2nd round RB who is about to start easing his way into the mix.
Canales is also being evaluated here.
On top of playing poorly, Bryce has no confidence. If that's the case, what's the point? Throwing him out there to continually be bad isn't going to help anyone.
This organization has been one of the worst for 5+ years now. At a point, you have to make changes. There are inflection points, and benching Bryce was one of them. He's not it.
The selling point on Bryce being able to overcome his size and lack of athleticism was processing and creativity. He has shown none of that in 18 NFL starts.
To an extent. You have tape to evaluate their play, so don't even have to look at raw stats. But I don't think it really matters when the team is in poor situations with either QB since they are losing frequently.
Yes, one of the few players who will need to be evaluated, but I don't think QB play will also affect this one that much.
Indeed. But Tepper will make rash decisions regardless.
Bryce has no confidence. If that's the case, what's the point? Throwing him out there to continually be bad isn't going to help anyone.
Then he shouldn't even be active. Cut him or trade him. Why is he even on the roster? He's not gaining confidence staying with this team or organization.
This organization has been one of the worst for 5+ years now. At a point, you have to make changes. There are inflection points, and benching Bryce was one of them. He's not it.
I don't think he's it either. No one really does. The thing is, unlike most sunk costs, the alternative doesn't offer anything at all. Bryce Young could be something. Andy Dalton could easily retire after this year.
The other side of the spectrum is the Browns where we've actually seen enough of Deshaun Watson based on what he was and where he is now. Their defense was very good last year and looks pretty good this year. That's a sunk cost where they should've moved on weeks ago and completely blew a season.
I’m with Heels on this.
heels def right. there's no point in playing Bruce. doing so is a disservice to every facet of the franchise
ANY/A
Dalton: 4.92
Bruce: 1.68
Sk%
Dalton: 4.19%
Bruce: 9.72%
there is no chance of the offense functioning w Bruce on the field. what is the point?
All I'll say is, the career outlooks for guys like Goff, Darnold, and Geno Smith were once almost as bad as Bryce Young's now.
Apparently there's some trade interest in him as a reclamation project. The Panthers should definitely be pursuing that.
He’s also boring and speaks without any passion, like he’d rather be anywhere else.
For every Goff (not sure I’d include him), Geno, and Darnold, there’s way more Lance, Z Wilson, Trubisky, etc.
I have no idea what might have been offered for Bryce, but I doubt it’s any better than the Z Wilson comp, so they probably figure, what’s the point? At least he’s not causing controversy in the locker room.
The Panthers will be down bad until Tepper changes his ways (highly unlikely) or whenever he eventually sells or dies.
I envy the Commanders, at least so far, for the ownership group they ended up with.
Here's the best advice you'll ever get: be rich and white.
Ravens fan seen assaulting Commanders fans was on 15-day alcohol, cocaine bender: officials
what's really embarrassing for the chiefs is their racist AF team name, and the tomahawk chop, and pre game war drum ritual... and how it says "end racism" in the end zone
wait til you take a gander at what's hidden behind the sidelines
It does matter.
Playing Bryce makes it impossible to evaluate the rest of the offense. Dalton is at least serviceable. The defense is going to make sure we lose either way. We don't need to be worried about draft position being affected by playing Dalton instead.
We also have a first year head coach trying to find his way.
There is a lot more to the organization and team than throwing Bryce to the wolves hoping he might improve from historically bad to just terrible.
also on the side for heeling
blue tick not withstanding
All I'll say is, the career outlooks for guys like Goff, Darnold, and Geno Smith were once almost as bad as Bryce Young's now.
Apparently there's some trade interest in him as a reclamation project. The Panthers should definitely be pursuing that.
the price will be right for some franchise, hopefully he's not permanently broken by then
Darnold (27), Goff (30), and Geno (34)
finding the correct offensive fit is important
sometimes takes a bit of trial and error but if you can afford the payroll long enough for a payoff it's worth the effort
DM'd SRM to see if he had an interest in this Mike Sando paywalled Athletic article and he said yep
told him i'd drop it here, as it covers a Purdy related topic SRM recently broached over the past week or so
tldr, SF has a major decision coming up (ldo) whether or not to drop the $60mm/yr bag on Purdy
- - - - - - - - - -
The 49ers’ shrinking window and how Brock Purdy fits (or might not)
Sunday provided an extreme example of what the San Francisco 49ers can look like, at their worst, with Brock Purdy left to fend for himself on offense.
Star running back Christian McCaffrey remained out. Starting receiver Deebo Samuel fell ill shortly before kickoff and lasted three snaps. The other starting receiver, Brandon Aiyuk, suffered a likely season-ending knee injury shortly before halftime.
If Purdy had carried the 49ers past the two-time defending Super Bowl champion Kansas City Chiefs with all that stacked against him, what else would remain for him to prove? That Purdy tossed three interceptions in a dreary 28-18 defeat might not change how the 49ers feel about their QB.
But the moment does provide an opening to consider the 49ers’ future as they move closer to the day when the 2024 season ends and Purdy becomes eligible for a massive contract extension.
“It could get tricky for them,” an exec from another team said.
The Pick Six column leads with the 49ers’ future in light of their 3-4 start to the season and important decisions that await. The full menu:
• Brock Purdy and the 49ers’ future
• A new Deshaun Watson conversation
• NFC North fallout: Lions, Vikings, Pack
• Jerry Jones is no Al Davis (that’s a good thing)
• Saints’ cap problems aren’t cap problems
• Two-minute drill: Tomlin’s QB decision
1. The 49ers are 3-4 and suffering from injuries that could threaten their championship window. What happens when they pay Purdy?
Purdy and Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes combined for zero touchdown passes and five interceptions Sunday. It was possibly a one-off game for both teams, unless the 49ers have reached a breaking point with injuries, which is possible.
Before Sunday, this 49ers season was largely a testament to Purdy’s ability to produce in an offense lacking McCaffrey, who remains sidelined indefinitely. Purdy was scrambling more and completing longer passes into tighter windows, which some saw as evidence that he’s more than just another system quarterback in a Kyle Shanahan offense.
Yes, Purdy struggled against the Chiefs’ man coverage schemes without McCaffrey, Aiyuk and Samuel there to help him (Aiyuk dropped a long pass at one point). But he has shown an ability to produce without all of his weaponry available.
The table below compares Purdy’s career production with and without McCaffrey on the field, provided either Aiyuk or Samuel was on the field when McCaffrey was not. This seemed like a fair way to measure Purdy’s production without McCaffrey, who is an elite game-plan consideration, provided Purdy still had at least one of his starting receivers.
The numbers are barely distinguishable.
Purdy career stats: McCaffrey on/off field
Even the best quarterbacks require a baseline level of weaponry to operate. Purdy likely dipped below that baseline Sunday against a very good Chiefs defense.
The larger trend is clear. Purdy’s production through 34 regular-season and postseason starts outpaces the production of his predecessor, Jimmy Garoppolo, under Shanahan. While the 49ers led the Chiefs by 10 points in separate Super Bowls with each of these QBs in the lineup, only to lose, Purdy has been demonstrably better.
That’s all fine, but what happens if, two years from now, Purdy is earning $55-60 million per year and San Francisco no longer has the roster to support him?
There are early signs the 49ers could be trending in that direction.
The 49ers could have decisions to make at receiver. Aiyuk and Samuel have option bonuses due in March; Aiyuk’s is guaranteed, while Samuel’s is not. The gap between the start of the league year and when those bonuses are due could provide a trade window before the bonuses hit the 49ers’ cap. Aiyuk’s knee injury could complicate things, but it’s fair to wonder what the longer-term future holds.
Left tackle Trent Williams is year-to-year at age 36. Tight end George Kittle, 31, will be in a contract year next season and could have leverage with a higher cap number.
San Francisco’s roster this season is the NFL’s third-oldest by snap-weighted average age. The Chiefs’ roster, in contrast, is the third-youngest by the same measure. That reveals which team is set up better for the long term.
While the Chiefs were restocking their defense through the draft in recent years, using first-round picks on cornerback Trent McDuffie and defensive end George Karlaftis, the 49ers were trading away a haul of picks in the ill-fated move to acquire Trey Lance.
San Francisco has funneled cash into its defense, signing Javon Hargrave (who is out for the season with a triceps injury) for $21 million per year. The 49ers have also hit on mid- and late-round picks. But they still have the NFL’s oldest offense and eighth-oldest defense, weighted for playing time.
“That is probably San Francisco’s biggest issue,” a different exec said. “They are starting to feel three first-round picks for Trey Lance. They have done a good job drafting with later picks. It is great they got Purdy. He makes up for one of those first-round picks, but not two others.”
Execs around the league have anticipated the 49ers extending Purdy’s contract in the coming offseason — his first time eligible for a new deal — even though Purdy is signed through 2025.
“They need to make a decision about whether they should just be moving on from this older core and building around Purdy, or do they trade Purdy, get stuff for him and go with a cheaper option at quarterback?” another exec said.
Wait, what?
Purdy is one of 45 quarterbacks to make at least 10 starts since 2022. He ranks first among them in passer rating (107.9), yards per pass attempt (9.2) and EPA per pass play (.214).
Who would trade a young quarterback as productive as that? The answer, so far, has been nobody. The exec was merely suggesting that Purdy, while good, does not belong in Tier 1 or the top of Tier 2, and that other teams in similar situations might have been better off, in retrospect, swinging trades than paying top dollar for their quarterbacks.
The Los Angeles Rams with Jared Goff, the Miami Dolphins with Tua Tagovailoa, the Dallas Cowboys with Dak Prescott and the Minnesota Vikings entering their final season with Kirk Cousins were among the examples he cited.
“It’s about being a guy being a dude, and Purdy is not in that ‘dude’ category,” the exec said.
The more likely scenario: Purdy and the 49ers reaching an agreement on an extension before the 2025 season.
“When you have a head coach that has the vision, you know what it is going to look like in the future,” another exec said. “Having the quarterback signed adds to the predictability. You are able to navigate. A lot of other things fall into place, and you can continue to build it as the cap increases.”
There’s much to consider. The 49ers are home against the Cowboys in Week 8, followed by a bye and, two days later, the Nov. 5 trade deadline.
“A lot of people would trade their situations with San Francisco,” the exec added. “They just aren’t as deep as they typically have been.”
honest question without disputing anyting, how many starting nfl qbs do as good or better in a similar situation
his avg yards per attempt is insane. no one else is doing that
There are multiple reasons a young roster in NFL is a plus. The challenge is to keep a foundation of high $ players while building around that with less expensive talent. And keep doing it year after year.
IMO KC has done very well in this regard. Bill's are trying and might get it this year. Rams are in rebuild mode and we'll see how that goes. Pretty obvious 9ers not doing so good staying young.
I'm all for players being paid, but why does it always have to be top of the market. The notion of "next man up" really baffles me.
Are teams just that afraid of missing out, or do they have to use a certain amount of their cap?
I'm all for players being paid, but why does it always have to be top of the market. The notion of "next man up" really baffles me.
Are teams just that afraid of missing out, or do they have to use a certain amount of their cap?
I think part of it is the leverage these QBs have over the teams. Only a handful of people on this planet can be very good/great QBs. The 49ers really don’t have a legit pathway to easily replace Purdy with anyone even close to his level.
you know these player's salaries don't come from thin air. they come from $1k tickets, $10 beers. $100 parking. military sponsorships that don't allow descendants of slaves to take a knee during the anthem, big oil sponsorhips, Dems and repubs ads, who are literally colluding to fight against democracy.
all teams should be seized, owned, and operated by the people. profits should go to the public good