Suitedjustice's Ongoing Mid-life Crisis
I woke up in the middle of choking to death again; though to be accurate, it was towards the end of the process--woke up right away in a white hot panic with black spots of permanent unconsciousness swooping in across both sides of my vision.
Calm yourself, was the first important step. My lungs were soaked, steeped in the things that belonged only in my stomach, and locked up tight. My air passage was blocked and burning with bile and hydrochloric acid. No, I don't have asthma. I have a drinking problem.
Spoiler
Though, now that I think about it, is that inhaler thing any good? Maybe I'll try a hit sometime, just to see.
This was last Friday, just a few hours after I'd quit my office job of twelve years to take a shot at playing poker for a living out West in Nevada. This will not be my first shot at gambling for a living; although I have only tried something like this once before, many years ago.
Around the turn of the century I quit college most of the way through my senior year and I moved out to Las Vegas for 8 years. My experiences were somewhat of interest: rampant drunkenness, a stolen lab animal, solid card counting, North Korean meth, time spent with Mormons, advantage slot grinding, a cowardly pass on an FBI Most Wanted bounty, facing contempt of court charges, and dressing up as Albus Dumbledore. You can find that in my BBV thread.
[U][url]https://forumserver.twoplustwo.c...[/U][/URL] .
That thread held up pretty well in BBV, which is not nothing.
Starting meditative relaxation can be problematic when you're dying from choking on your own puke. I sat up straight, blind from the black splotches that had slapped away the weak light of the kitchen stove. I dropped my shoulders, relaxed my chest and upper arms, and then, projecting calm with all my might, I tried my throat. I pictured my lungs and throat opening up just a tiny passage, for just a little air to go by--something to get me started. And they did, untethering just the smallest little rivulet of air, and it made the most terrifying sound as it went through. It always does.
Whatever you've heard from actors pretending to gasp after being choked, the reality is worse. At least no one was with me this time. When that's been the case, the other person has invariably freaked the **** out when they've heard my gasping and choking routine, which only adds the burden of myself having to reassure them through nodding and non-frantic gestures, so that they won't call 911, as I hate the idea of calling the cops.
April 13th of this year was 14 months without me having a drink. During that long stretch I had honestly forgotten why I'd quit. That's right, I had completely purged from my recall the years of nighttime memories of myself almost choking to death, this happening once or twice every couple of weeks on average. Now, the terrifying night wakeups didn't happen even once during the 14 dry months. But 3 weeks back into drinking--oh yeah--there was that thing, wasn't there?.
Now, there was something else I'd forgotten about. And that's the Double Tap. The Double Tap happens when I don't force my drunk and tired and traumatized self to remain awake for a good two or three hours after a choking incident. If I fall back asleep before then, I wake up choking to death all over again. And sure enough, that happened last Friday, and I had to save myself again.
So on Saturday I jumped back on the waggy, and Cinco de Mayo is now my new anniversary date, and that's really enough about drinking. I'm not here to write about that business. I should have been done with it; and now I am.
My flight leaves for Reno in a few hours, and I'll be out there for the next 3 weeks scouting out the live poker games in the city. If I like it, that's where I'm moving to.
Very nice review of Singin' in the Rain! ♥ Can you believe it didn't even get a nomination for Best Picture? The Greatest Show on Earth won that award, which I thought was pretty mediocre.
when local library district funding decreases
the emphasis on suppressing education should become even more apprent
It's an ancient con: keep the population ignorant and gullible so they'll cheer while the oligarchs pick their pockets and strip their resources and safeguards.
Very nice review of Singin' in the Rain! ♥ Can you believe it didn't even get a nomination for Best Picture? The Greatest Show on Earth won that award, which I thought was pretty mediocre.
Thanks Sheep!
Yeah, I'm shocked that it wasn't even nominated. Plenty of lesser musicals have gotten the nod over the years.
I've never seen The Greatest Show on Earth, but I have seen it near the top or at the top of at least one Worst Oscar Winners list, so I won't be checking that out any time soon.
The Dry 2024 Challenge Update
January: ✓
February: ✓
March: ✓
April: ✓
May: ✓
June: ✓
July: ✓
August: ✓
September: ✓
October: ✓
November: ✓
December: UNLOCKED
Well, here I am, in the final month of the challenge. I've barely given drinking a thought lately, because I have the more dire need to get back on the tables and on to the slot floor. I have to earn, starting this month, this week, today, or this experiment is over.
Mark Twain wrote that there is nothing to be learned from the second kick of the mule. I, the mule, have kicked myself in this way three times over the years from not working enough, from not believing in myself. I don't need this lesson again; I need to pay the bills.
I'm off to work today. Wish me luck. I'm going to need it.
Congratulations on the unlock, and good luck on unlocking the rungood!
what new content will this achievement have unlocked?
a sober at the strip club challenge perchance?
well done suited! Rooting for you to close out the year strong.
america doesn't like sheep porn apparently as much as new zealand
Thanks golddog! So far, so good.
Thanks bob_124! One Day at a Time is a cliché (and also a decent early 80s sitcom), but clichés stand the test of time for a reason (unlike early 80's sitcoms).
what new content will this achievement have unlocked?
a sober at the strip club challenge perchance?
As much as I advocate for supporting single mothers, I need to work lower on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs and keep food, rent, bills and debt reduction unlocked.
Thanks Sheep! I found the live, singalong version.
My financial strategy in the months previous to this one was to set a weekly schedule based on the poker room promos, then I would procrastinate, One Day at a Time, and goof off until the end of the month loomed. At that point I would procrastinate some more, only adding an ever-growing amount of guilt and dread to the mix.
I need to turn this around. To wit: I'm going to the casino every day this month until I have the funds I need to pay the bills and cut down on my debt. Then I can think about procrastinating. If this works right, I'll be procrastinating on my procrastination, thereby turning weakness into strength.
Yesterday, I booked a win at the tables. It was a small one, but it was the first win in a long time. After that, the slots were kind to me for the first time in a while.
Spoiler
It would have been nice to hit some outs and boat up or quad up on a some of those hands, but I'll take what I can get.
For December, MGM has downscaled the payouts on their NFL football promo to the point where it's hardly worth going; however, when they're not running the football games, they're running a mystery bounty type high hand with hourly prizes between $200 and $10000. So I'll be playing that, and hoping for a Big Score.
December 2024 ****'s Creek Navigation Update
MGM Springfield $1/$2 poker: 5 hours
+$82.00
MGM Springfield Slots: 3 hours
+$664.28
Running Poker Total December: 5 hours, +$82.00
Running Slot Total December: 3 hours, +$664.28
Total December: 8 hours, +$746.28
♥
boom nice
i think i've always been lucky in the sense that i don't really get much enjoyment out of watching tv or movies and my natural state is to be on the grind
autism can be pretty op at times - but it can also lead to burnout where i have to force myself to take some time off periodically just because it's otherwise a never ending shuffle
like i'll stop at a casino specifically because it's a place i can spend the night for free - but then i'll find myself naturally wanting to play poker until this good game breaks at 5 am which severely negates the entire purpose of driving 30 minutes off my planned route for the free hotel in the first place when i can only end up sleeping about 5-6 hours before checkout anyway
so then i obviously book a second night and push back all my plans by a day only to find myself at 2 am the next night saying to myself "but it's a really good game I should stay" and then talk myself into playing until 3 only play another orbit at 3 so i end up racking up at 3:30 to get some but not much sleep and again hating life because that's a pretty good game i'm leaving - very easy to lose sight of the big picture which is, i'm not even supposed to be there anyway - i'm trying to get somewhere else
Thanks fid!
boom nice
i think i've always been lucky in the sense that i don't really get much enjoyment out of watching tv or movies and my natural state is to be on the grind
autism can be pretty op at times - but it can also lead to burnout where i have to force myself to take some time off periodically just b
I like that you're wandering the country, visiting casinos. If I build up enough of a bankroll, I might do the same, as it ought to make for some good blogging content.
As far as live cash poker goes: I don't love it, so I find excuses to leave the table rather than stay. I like playing poker, but I prefer tournaments, partly because I'm good at them, and partly because they're stories. They have a beginning, then often a middle section, and always an ending, more often than not in tears; however, the rare tournament triumphs are amazing, a real, natural high.
The live cash game is different. It begins the very first time that you sit down at a table, and then it runs for the rest of your life. I play cash because I don't have the bankroll to play live tournaments, and the online tourneys are getting swamped with real time assistance, and are therefore unsustainable for making a living wage.
Another good day. I played well, albeit a shade too conservatively, with my bankroll and liferoll being mixed and in danger for the moment.
If I'm lucky enough to have a few more good days like this, I'll be able to open up my game a bit more.
December 2024 ****'s Creek Navigation Update
MGM Springfield $1/$2 poker: 5 hours
+$430.00
MGM Springfield Slots: 2 hours
+$14.75
Running Poker Total December: 10 hours, +$512.00
Running Slot Total December: 5 hours, +$679.03
Total December: 15 hours, +$1191.03
is the hunt included in the hours or just the button pushing hours?
Another good day. I played well, albeit a shade too conservatively, with my bankroll and liferoll being mixed and in danger for the moment.
If I'm lucky enough to have a few more good days like this, I'll be able to open up my game a bit more.
December 2024 ****'s Creek Navigation Update
My best poker years haven’t come from when I’ve played my “best” and most aggressive poker (and boy do I love a good LAG session).
My best/most profitable years have been when I can stay disciplined to the running the best exploitative lines vs my opponents. When I can stay disciplined and keep smashing the TAG button vs the casually regs who refuse to adjust, I’ve printed at 1/3.
I encourage you to stay disciplined and do what works over and over again until it’s no longer working. Go print some living wages buddy
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Out of my 5 slot hours booked so far this month, I've probably spent 15 minutes actively playing. As you know, some plays bog down, and the machine won't hit for many minutes, even with dedicated fast spin spazz tapping, but that hasn't happened yet this month.
My best poker years haven’t come from when I’ve played my “best” and most aggressive poker (and boy do I love a good LAG session).
My best/most profitable years have been when I can stay disciplined to the running the best exploitative lines vs my opponents. When I can stay d
Thanks Nāt! You've played a few hours with me, so you know that I'm pretty snug. According to the solvers, we're actually supposed to play super nitty when everyone's opening 5bb+ in a raked game, which is the case in $1/$2 and $1/$3; however, the solvers assume that the openers are playing perfectly, which is the opposite of how they're playing. So I have to remind myself from time to time that it's necessary to throw in chips in order to receive chips back.
Everything was going fine today (technically yesterday) until I looked out and saw that it was snowing, MGM Springfield being one of those rare casinos that allows views into the world outside.
It was the first snow of the year here after the previous winter's nearly snowless passing, and people tend to donk around the roads until they shake the rust off their snow driving skills—it's not like riding a bike, more like riding a bike with bald tires in the snow.
I signed up for this gig so I wouldn't be obligated to commute during snowstorms, so I cut the day short and drove home before it got bad. If we have more snowy days coming up, I will be staying home. Fair warning.
In any case, the green results continue. I got into a 3-way preflop all-in vs a $50 stack and a $160 stack while holding AKs. I bricked the entire runout, and I still won the full pot with A high. That was a nice slice of rungood.
December 2024 ****'s Creek Navigation Update
MGM Springfield $1/$2 poker: 2 hours
+$190.00
MGM Springfield Slots: 2 hours
+$50.16
Running Poker Total December: 12 hours, +$702.00
Running Slot Total December: 7 hours, +$729.19
Total December: 19 hours, +$1431.19
According to the solvers, we're actually supposed to play super nitty when everyone's opening 5bb+ in a raked game, which is the case in $1/$2 and $1/$3; however, the solvers assume that the openers are playing perfectly, which is the opposite of how they're playing. So I have to remind myself from
Yeah you can forget about these solutions and playing more is right. Peeps open J7o UTG because they feel like it or it's their lucky hand or what have you
Out of my 5 slot hours booked so far this month, I've probably spent 15 minutes actively playing. As you know, some plays bog down, and the machine won't hit for many minutes, even with dedicated fast spin spazz tapping, but that hasn't happened yet this month.
Thanks Nāt! You've played a few ho
You’re generally a tight is right and observant player. I love solvers and like you’re sort of saying we gotta not let them get in our heads too much. Why? Because the average players are highly exploitable and we all found ways to make $$$ at this game before solvers. Gotta tap into that core skill set sometimes and just play the players while they play their hands [emoji1430]
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Yeah you can forget about these solutions and playing more is right. Peeps open J7o UTG because they feel like it or it's their lucky hand or what have you
I’ve been savagely playing K5 suited like it’s KK from all positions while limp/3-betting JJ-AA UTG. Why? Because I feel like getting out of pocket in a way I feel like Ivey would give a nod to [emoji1787][emoji2375]
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Ok, you have kind of a wide range here. 95% of the time limp-3betting UTG is middle aged or older peeps and KK+. Occasionally AK or QQ. The most unbalanced spot in live low limit poker, so easy to fold. But suited knows that better than us, prolly.
JJ is kind of funny too. Some peeps open fold JJ cos "it's impossible to play".
There are all sorts of flavors of UTG shenanigans, including the following:
Fun player limps UTG with $160, I make it $12 from MP with AKs, BB makes it $25 from his $50 stack, fun UTG flats the $25, I 4bet to $100, BB calls all-in for less, and fun player says "Y'all tryin' to get me out of this", and 5bet shoves to $160 with Q7o.
That was the hand where my AKs held three ways unimproved. The standard runout would have the fun player hitting his 7 on the river, and he knew it. But the poker gods were merciful. BB had AQo.
There are all sorts of flavors of UTG shenanigans, including the following:
Fun player limps UTG with $160, I make it $12 from MP with AKs, BB makes it $25 from his $50 stack, fun UTG flats the $25, I 4bet to $100, BB calls all-in for less, and fun player says "Y'all tryin' to get me out, and 5bet sh
A rare (but deserved) merciful runout from the gods! May this be the sign of the changing tides?!
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