"The Pen:" Live NLHE Chat Thread

I’m not a Music Guy in the slightest (I barely knew who Albini was), but I’m enjoying the hell out of that AMA. Thanks!

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Haven't checked in in a while but glad to see sabr brags are alive and well

Clocked 1mph faster after 23k month

lol I got the tag light one out one time.

I had been out playing poker on a Friday night. Game broke early so I headed home and stopped at the grocery store at around 11:30. Take a left at a light on the main highway and noticed that the cop sitting at the red light immediately did a U-turn through the light after I went by and got behind me. I am like wtf - not speeding and a I had a green light. We go through 2 lights and I get lit up. I pull into a parking lot and wait. I sit there a few minutes and then notice backup had arrived and I count multiple cop cars (I think 4) with lights flashing.
WTF?
Finally, I see 3 officers approaching and they have me bracketed. No guns out but they seem ready. Lady cop on the driver's side gets to where she can see me, and I can see her body language relax. She comes up to the window, is super nice, and asks for my ID. No registration or insurance. Comes back a few minutes later and says I had a tag light out and she said get it fixed but no warning ticket.
Okay?
They mount up and I drive home very puzzled. I am at the dealership the next day getting an oil change and I ask them to put in a new tag light while they are at it. Tech comes back later and says my light is fine. I did some research and I all I could find was earlier that evening a car similar to mine was involved in a road rage incident (gun was pulled on another driver) just down the road from where I was pulled over. So I am guessing that's what that was all about. I would have preferred they just said that. I didn't match the description of that driver at all, so I figured it was that or the fact I made her panties wet which is why the lady cop eased up.

oh man, if i knew the army had pizza deliveries i would have definitely signed up

but for realskis, I've been pulled over about a dozen times, probably 10 of times I had contraband in the vehicle or was already high to begin with

being polite, wearing a collared shirt and showing you are educated by speaking in complete sentences without the presence of a regional accent will do wonders for getting that stuff spun into warnings instead of tickets

once got pulled while actively smoking a blunt in the car with my buddy on some small town road where i grew up

we were worried he'd see if we tossed it so took advantage of the fact that there was no shoulder to pull off onto and just kept driving with our turn signal on for an extended period with all windows down and sunroof open to air it out

plan was to get to a bridge over a nearby stream where buddy could toss it and then even if he saw it then it'd be unlikely he could have recovered it as evidence

but then about quarter mile before the bridge there's a long shoulder and the cop starts beeping indicating his patience was wearing thin so we just shove it into the ashtray and close it hoping for the best

we thought we'd succeeded in airing out the car, guy asked for my license and registration - i gave it to him, he takes a look at it then hands it back

asks me if i know why i got pulled over, i say no idea

he tells me my tail light is out and i need to get that fixed because it's unsafe

i thank him for letting me know

then as he leaves, he reminds me that marijuana is illegal and it's especially unsafe to smoke it while driving, he also alerts me that there's smoking arising from my center console so perhaps i should get my electronics checked when i fix the light

we look down in horror to notice that indeed the blunt did not go out and a tiny stream of thick blunt smoke was oozing out of the ash tray

he then gets in his car, pulls a u-turn and drives away

just wanted to troll us a bit i guess

also drove down through baha with a couple buddies on spring break and we brought about an ounce of mushrooms with us and a whole lot of weed and it was all stored in the compartment inside the rear seat that flapped down to access the trunk

we show up at a military check point - thus far we'd been waved through them all

these guys stop us, tell us to get out, begin searching the car, open the trunk, check the center console and glove box, search under the seats, stick the mirrors under the car

they searched everywhere except nobody pulled down that thing in the middle of the seat - it's not obvious if you're not looking for it, but it's also not exactly hidden either (we we smart enough to have tucked the tab in so wasn't protruding like in the image)

so that was just pure luck, but i imagine had they opened that compartment, the collared shirt and polite demeanor would have resolved it

"You can't bust me if you don't know what you found"

Give it a few minutes to warm up...

Sorry it's almost 20 minutes.

I was profiled moar times than I can count in one of the 3 different subis that I painted. Luckily I have matured and although my current subi is well over the league minimum miles to warrant customization I have elected not to and I no longer get profiled.

In the People’s Republic of Australia they set up roadside Random Breath Test areas and they’ll stop 5-6 cars at a time and check license and registration and then test you for booze and also drugs if you look seedy (meth and pot). So I’d guess I get stopped by cops once a year or so

Also speed cameras that have the added ability to see if you’re on your phone. I’ve had several large fines from them recently which is annoying and I’m close to losing my license. Have to be total cleanskin for another 10 months or it’s a 6 month ban.

The prospect of the ban was enough to persuade me to buy a new car that has Apple Car Play and voice activated calls and texts so that I have no need to touch my phone any more. Which tbh I only ever really do to flick through ads on podcasts or click through to get someone’s number to call

sounds like you’ve sold out Squidders….or are you Chicken??

Squid was kind enough to give me a ride down to MGM for the first meet up game. I remember telling him as I got into the Squid Mobile "Just to be clear, you picked me up hitchhiking and I know nothing about what is in this car."

We have roadblocks in GA. No mandatory breath tests but they are fishing for probable cause. I haven't seen one for a bit, but they often target them in high crime areas or where they have had a lot of issues and are basically using them as warrant checks.

I still say speed cameras are bullshit. No cop, no stop = no violation. At least here the car gets the ticket and its no points on a license since they can't prove who was driving (for now at least).

Drive safely, Feely. The hookers in Vegas are awaiting your triumphant return.

@feely I think im kind of pussay tbh. I am extremely lazy when it comes to dealing with bureaucracy. I have been back in utah for almost 5 years and I still have florida plates on the current subi (which from an insurance cost is absolutely moronic, but fcuk it I dont care). I am fearful if I customize it with a wicked ossum paint job Im going to get lit up by the fuzz and then b forced to do stuff i prefer not to do.

5 years? time flies doesn't it?

I get it btw - I hate bureaucracy. Have been in Australia 24+ years and have still not become a citizen

brother bought me a carplay setup as a gift, it's a game changer, no need to buy another car, can just buy a screen and attach it to the dash

squid, that car looks insanely awesome, makes me sad you sold out

@rick - that was zippy#2. The electrical system crapped out right in the local gym parking lot. I was super sad cuz all of my subis have died, been wrecked, or stolen prior to 200k. I believe that one died at 195-197k. It is getting hauled away on a flatbed in the photos. The mother of my daughter was smart enough to grab some pix for posterity. Current subi has shattered the 200k barrier

@fw moves a little too fast these days it seems

Slow-rolled a guy in a $700 pot tonight for no reason other than I was tilting from an earlier hand. It wasn’t even the same guy!

rick's story sounds like something from Super Troopers.

@feelwrath, you'll really enjoy the integrated phone in your car. Super nice to just tell the car, "call X", and the magic works.

Not getting my Subie painted up like squid's, but I like what he shows there.

In a previous lifetime decades ago, I once had a double header sports day: a soccer game followed almost immediately by a hockey game (where I was the goalie). I had decided I really only had time to play the first half of the soccer game, but due to the team being short / injuries, we only had exactly 11 players. So I stuck it out for the whole game, immediately ran off the pitch at the final whistle without even shaking hands, booted as fast as my '81 Plymouth Colt could go to the hockey game, and barely had time to dress in order to make the face-off.

About a week later, I get a photo radar speeding ticket in the mail, with a nice shot of the back of my head as I'm speeding to my hockey game. I gladly paid the fine and was quite relieved it wasn't a live cop that stopped me or otherwise my hockey team would have had to start the game without a goalie.

GstillhasthephotoinashoeboxsomewhereG

thanks for the advice. i will attempt to do all of this.

Bruh, we see squid's Squid Mobile and we think Scooby Doo Mystery Machine/**** that is cool.

We see you with your pink gun and think

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In Germany, the picture must show the driver for that very reason. At first they took a picture of the whole front of the car, but apparently too many wives were seeing pictures of their husband speeding with some other woman in the passenger seat. So they focused the cameras to only show the driver's side. That means Brits can speed in Germany with impunity in their right-hand drive cars.

Good luck Johnny. First time at wsop is great - the sheer size of the main room and the noise of the chips is quite the experience

The food and snacks options are awful and expensive unfortunately - worse at Paris and Horseshoe than Rio. I think they were charging $8 for a Quest bar. I would eat a good meal before the day and either pack enough protein bars and fruit or take something pre prepared. Otherwise the best options are Wahlgreen/CVS on the Strip which still aren’t great