"The Pen:" Live NLHE Chat Thread

Me two

I'd love to get him into a poker game, because he has a massive tell.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy,
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, and
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy.

(Okay, one of them is TV.)

Now that you say that, I think you’re right. I took a shot in the dark.

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Another description would be a younger Obi-Wan Kenobi.

MODS: This is a strange request, but could I get someone to ban my account here? I really want to quit poker (it’s clearly an unhealthy problem for me at this point) and think that would be helpful.

Thank you

I’m not a mod, but not a strange request. I hope you already self-excluded from your nearby casinos?

He has, but also signed up for Draft Kings the same day... just to see what it's like.

there's a self ban thread

https://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/55/ab...

If you could get Sean Perry to STFU forever more, you'd be doing the Lord's work. JFC that guy is tilting.

Did you win that bet Rick?

Thank you! And yes, heading back to the card room tomorrow to redeem my rewards and then get myself perma-banned.

i heard from reliable sources that he used to beard for a very sharp syndicate

i think once that well ran dry he decided he wanted to stay in the game

i don't follow his results or anything, but he's up there with vegas dave and steve stevenson as some of the scummiest fraud touts out there - he's regularly laughed at/poked fun at in the discords i'm in

but alas, it seems like he's still getting customers hence why he keeps up the grind - guess people really are that stupid, i often wonder if i'm being dumb not trying to be a scammer fraud like him raking in tons of variance free sub money but don't think i could live with myself doing that

yup, been on a fantastic run ever since losing about 4k on hot dog unders - low key worried about collecting from one of them because it's such a big number

in other news, took niece and nephew to a penny candy store tonight, they are 7 and 8 - tried giving them a budget but that unleashed major doubt and fomo over every decision "is it optimal to get the sour path kids?" and such questions so then i said no more budget just let er rip and that worked a little but alas was still grounded in the original budgetary framework

took those kids like 35 minutes to pick out what they wanted, a teenager in the store says "i wish i had a sugardaddy to buy things for me like that" and obviously the name sugardaddy stuck so from then on the kids loudly called me sugardaddy the rest of the evening and obviously trying to discourage that only made them say it more - hoping they forget it overnight, fingers crossed

otherwise, going to be turning lots of heads going forward whenever i'm out with them in public

You won't miss it a bit. Good luck, mang

I'm going to be less poor tonight if LAFC beat New Mexico United

if they tie or lose outright then i'm going to lose piles and will be dming you all about couchsurfing for housing

this goes without saying, but do not tail, not only am i a moron but the value is also all gone

so you arent into the whole kelly thing then huh?

This is the correct answer. Good luck, davo.

i can't get down enough to even bother with kelly, even for march madness, the betmgm brick and mortar sportsbook wouldn't allow me to wager more than 1500 on anything, which was super annoying because they put out some very silly lines like Uconn outlasting Purdue -130 - was prepared to put 10k on that

this "big position" tonight is like -7k pain vs +4k joy

i usually can't get down more than $500 on any positions so typically just jam that max bet on everything

these are all "max wagers" which is kind of sad when you see a bunch are just for $50 (the numbers bigger than 500 are due to vig)

the reason why i have more than typical $500ish on this game is because this was another lineup info news thing instead of just picking off a stale line so was able to get down across various outs instead of the one place that hung a bad one

if i stick with this long term, the focus will not be at improving modeling but instead improving my capability to get down for large amounts across many outs - that sadly involves dealing with people - which may shock the thread, but is not my strongest skill nor something i'm very fond of

Those are rookie numbers. You need to get those numbers up!!

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Now show us lost!

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Titty rubbing time it appears

Went to see my long time golf swing instructor yesterday for a long morning session and the first thing he said after I hit a few balls was "Oh boy"

Did you just, “but how much did you lose,” me?

This wasn’t my bet(s). It was a friend’s from a few years back right before he passed away. My guy was going hard in the paint on DK. All Phil Ivey like, “I just want to feel that pain where it’s hard to breathe.” I think the biggest bet I saw him make was $7,500. Unsure if he ever did 5 figures in one bet. I couldn’t handle those swings. Puke.