A raging fish on a heater
Intro,
A memoir of a degen:
I've always loved to gamble, and I have done so since I was a kid. It did not start of very w
The misery brings me back from the dead.
Not a single penny to my name and about $5k in debt.
Had a run in a $530 Bounty Builder which I sattied in to for $11. This was a couple of days ago, cant remember when exactly.
No bounties, didnt cash. Lost my KQ vs QJ for about 35BBs...
These make it or break it moments are breaking me to pieces.
All I feel is deep despair.
My ex. best friend keeps berating me and tells me im delusional, but I know I will make it eventually.
Poker isnt what it was back in 2016 but I am one bink away from changing my life.
SCOOP is here soon and I will be studying hard for it with the intention of taking down a title.
Played live aswell today lost a 200bb pot with top two against the NFD, Kd on the turn sealing his diamond draw and no pairing on the river - bye.
Before that I played Cash game Live bought in for $200 and got it in on Ace high board with my AhTh vs AQo on the turn - bye money.
Cluster**** of segments now but I was also playing an online tournament today the $82 fast Friday. Got it in real good for a triple up with AdTd vs 99 and 55. Flopped a FD but had too many outs brick brick :P
Yeah idgaf if someone IRL finds this journal, I am not ashamed of who I am.
I am a ****ing miserable degenerate.
Kthxbai.
"one bink away from changing my life"
More like one downswing away from ending it ....
SCOOP is here soon and I will be studying hard for it with the intention of taking down a title.
yea bro bink a scoop.
Cause his life sucks and he wants to spread that negative energy.
Nobody reasonable comes in here to throw stuff att someone who right now is on the ropes.
Got the red lights from brush to play Live today and I havent got a penny to my name....
Going out partying today (sober) because I cant do any drugs. Got a couple of drug screenings coming up in case if I want to keep my drivers license. So Yeah no k3tamine for me :/
Cause his life sucks and he wants to spread that negative energy.
Nobody reasonable comes in here to throw stuff att someone who right now is on the ropes.
Got the red lights from brush to play Live today and I havent got a penny to my name....
Going out partying today (sober) because I cant do any drugs. Got a couple of drug screenings coming up in case if I want to keep my drivers license. So Yeah no k3tamine for me :/
Yeah don’t lose that. Any easy jobs to kill some time and help ease the debts and bring some freedom for ya? Little discipline from work might be good overall tbh (aside from ez cash)
Yeah don’t lose that. Any easy jobs to kill some time and help ease the debts and bring some freedom for ya? Little discipline from work might be good overall tbh (aside from ez cash)
I work as a substitutes teacher which gives me a couple of days a weeks worth of working.
Just played a mini session, bought in for $100 and was up at $230 (holy cow high stakes eh).
Got it all in in a bomb pot where I had a flush draw and gutshot 1st board and open ender on second. Bricked both 😃
Then I bust on KQJ7 holding KJ v k7 v AT XD.
Could maybe have folded but Yeah, i didnt.
IDK what to do now really busto and unable to grind. Will find some degenerate way of getting money I suppose.
there is not a clear thought between your ears youre just a 30 smthing dreamer thats never getting out the basement of your parents....ask your mum for some chores so you can hop in a sattie and whine about it in here later.
all that really matters is whether someone is satisfied with their own circumstances, But your measure of "success" is absolutely meaningless, except to a person who can only measure their own success by other people's standards, or by comparison. (that would be you btw)
i achieved my own setout goals and am very happy with my life and the people that surround me so in my mind thats a succes
Dudes coping hard. Cant beat nl10
Dont play satties.
Play 2nl
Don't play satties
Don't play 2nl
Play micro mtt (under 5$) with small fields
Stop trying to bink big and bink many small ones and scale that up.
all that really matters is whether someone is satisfied with their own circumstances, But your measure of "success" is absolutely meaningless, except to a person who can only measure their own success by other people's standards, or by comparison. (that would be you btw)
i achieved my own setout goals and am very happy with my life and the people that surround me so in my mind thats a succes
If spreading misery was your goal, congrats 🎉
Don't play satties
Don't play 2nl
Play micro mtt (under 5$) with small fields
Stop trying to bink big and bink many small ones and scale that up.
I gave him the same advice a couple months ago, his response was
yeah 100-200 and grind 5 dollar freezeeouts idk that's not my taste tbh doesn't even tingle at all.
He's a degen/addict. Until he finds a way around those underlying issues he's going to keep repeating the same thing over and over.
Deposit 100$ and hide your balance, idk maybe that help not being degen.
right ****ing now sattied into the $215 stackosaurus (who said stop playing sats????)
and sattied into the 44 red lotus.
so yeah, we cooking.
shoutout to deekaybee and swerb22, and small shoutout to rolled high, bro for at least not being a piece of **** and posting constructive stuff.
the rest can EAD XD
k
thx
BAI
https://www.pokerstarsreplayer.com/hands...
man im so ****ing devastated
it all hit me at once, all of the hope turned in to ashes and dust
i had the ****ing chance to clear all my debts and now i am just buried even deeper
FML
W T F ARE EVEN THE ****ING ODDS OF HIM HAVING THE NUT ****ING STRAIGHT LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL **** I THOUGHT I WAS ****ING GOOD
