"The Pen:" Live NLHE Chat Thread

sabr, as someone who's also been a professional gambler for over a decade

and someone who's been trying to get out of that - but only into high paying careers - and utterly failing at that

i'm deeply sympathetic - i have never had suicidal thoughts, but i've had many lengthy moments of doubt and depression

i've had terrible stretches that nearly broke me and when i look at myself today - i can't help but realize that i would have been far better off if i never left my 9-5 tech job back in 2013 to pursue dfs full time

i even had a losing year at 1-2 last year - which was a huge ego blow for someone who 2 decades prior was winning 20k pots in macau

you absolutely have options, living in a worse apartment, taking a humbling job etc

that's what i'm doing, i'm now at the point where i'm happily applying for jobs that mean taking a huge paycut just because i want out long term and those positions - although they are entry level, are within organizations where i believe i can prove myself and gain rapid promotion

something to think about

Sabr, I am truly sorry that you are having such a rough go at the gamboolin. Besides seeking perfessional help I highly advise you 100% stop playing pokerz, stay away from the casino, and commune with nature in as bigly a way as possible (beach, mountains, desert, forest, hot, cold, it does not matter). Get out there and clear your head and rediscover the beauty of it all. The casino environment is detremental to mental health for reasons that have been beaten to death repeatedly.

Killing yerself cuz you have been cheated/run below expectations is really shortsighted. To last as long as you have in gamboolin requires a ton of grit. Your fortitude is being tested. I believe you have exactly what it takes to get out of gambling, transition into something else and have a happy and fulfilling life.

DO NOT QUIT ON YOURSELF

That sounds good in theory but who's paying my rent next week?

It's not as if I don't enjoy poker. I may not enjoy the suckouts, or winning 2 out of every 10 flips, but I do enjoy knowing that my decision-making is still more consistently good than anyone else's. It still gives me joy to make a good read against some try-hard and trap them for their entire stack (as long as I hold up, which can be a big ask).

The constant cycle of running way below EV and being in debt would be highly detrimental to anyone's well-being and mental state.

“SABR42”, read the book Ego is the Enemy. I suspect it will quite literally save your life.

TY.

Also, run the EV calc. It's literally a free roll. Things are already as bad as they can get. I know you can't envision therapy, meds, or getting out of poker helping, but the chance is definitely non-zero chance it will, and no way it could make it worse.

this poker/NBA scam thing could be really good fun

Snap out of it.

There's this guy who jumped from the Golden Gate bridge decades ago and this quote has stuck with me.

Yea its already zany. Its going to be fun to watch unfold

@OS - ive never heard that before. Its definitely an all time great imo.

every time there's a new, highly publicised poker cheating situation I think that it might be the beginning of the end of big private games, but it never seems to be.

almost all the high stakes and mid stakes cash games in Sydney are now private (which is great for me and my occasional games at the casino), but I really wonder how so many people don't even seem to worry about game safety

So incredibly easy to have some degenerate's scumbag friends show up wearing balaclavas and carrying blades or guns to rob the game. Or have a competent mechanic dealing and rob someone blind without ever knowing it happened - I think these cheaters only ever get caught by throwing any sense of caution to the winds.

they were cheating using high tech stuff, which really doesn't cost much if you're playing big enough or medium enough and long enough... this is why I've sworn off private games for years.

+1

Do you still have multiple high end cars and could possibly liquidate one?

As the quote above states, nothing is unfixable (apart from ending things), but you're currently not in the right state of mind to see the forest thru the trees. As G said earlier, seeking professional help is a freeroll and you have literally nothing to lose and everything to gain. Take that step first and everything will (eventually) fall into place.

GgoodluckSABRG

Brag (Beat?): Wife and I are going to a 60's themed murder mystery dinner party tomorrow night.

Beat: Um... World Series Game#2?

Variance: If they ain't showing the ball game I might just turn this into a very quick mass murder / suicide?

GcluelessleavingthehousenoobG

I am rooting for you but clearly Dodgers in 5.

Half your roster are former Guardians so I have an unusual amount of interest in this one.

Hope Bieber throws a perfect game and Gimenez hits for the cycle.

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yes, there's quite a few survivors of golden gate jumps each year and all of them unanimously regret jumping

The World Series is the best. I first became aware that it was happening in 1996, when the Yankees were beginning their dynasty run. I stayed up late into the night that week, with a piece of lined white paper and a pencil, I took notes of the game for a school assignment as my Father explained the history of baseball to me.

I've watched more ballgames this year than I have in quite a while, although only Blue Jays games (so I have no idea what the other teams are like). Though the Dodgers are formidable, there's no quit in this Jays team and it has the most fun lineup they've had in a decade. The Springer Dinger the other night was electrifying.

GhasnoideawhattheyaregoingtodowithBoBichetteG

I'm with the Jays!

Team #BeatLA always. Always.

Almost

Yankees vs Dodgers - we root for them both to lose

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Root for two consecutive large meteor strikes to the stadiums in games 2 and 3